They developed these techn0logies with one single purpose in mind: to liquidate those evil grace-hating man-loving free-will worshiping Pelagian Popish-Pagans: the Armenians. Since long time true believers in the Only True and Correct Doctrines of Grace aka TULIP have been trying to rid the world of the imputent plague known as Armenianism.
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We bought several copies of this classic masterwork and are now halfway through with building our own Nuclear Power-plant and several Doomsday Death Devices and other Weapons of “Papalist” Mass Destruction to aid our fellow Discernmentalists in our 2012 Doomsday/Armageddon Plans; to help power-up our Rapture machines and to help us to profit off of all the non-elect unregenerate reprobate Postmodern emergent heathens and other unsaved pagans Left Behind; and also to help us to destroy the Semi-Pelagees (Armenianists and Romanists) once and for all!
Everyone makes mistakes but the ODMafia. Everyone (except the ODMafia) may forget to write a date down or accidently not carry that two as they calculate the day of the Rapture, so, why not make money as you do? We know that we will be the Chosen One’s who make it, but a few of you may also have to stay behind as you were not as holy as we are. This book can be your survivor’s guide after the Rapture or bad date setting.
It will teach:
1. How to motivate people to give.
2. How to find the cheapest billboards in town to keep face while pocketing the rest of the money.
3. Get others to finance TV and radio spots while still giving money to fund your new Mercedes!
Taking from the knowledge of Tim and Evie Levy who interviews hundreds of past Rapture giants will show you how you too can live high on the fear of others.
“I would to God that every holy day (including Christmas – ed.) whatsoever besides the Lord’s day were abolished. That zeal which brought them first in, was without all warrant of the Word, and merely followed corrupt reason, forsooth to drive out the holy days of the pagans, as one nail drives out another. Those holy days have been so tainted with superstitions that I wonder we tremble not at their very names.” – Martin Bucer, cited in William Ames, A Fresh Suit Against Human Ceremonies in God’s Worship (1633), pp. 359-60.
“And next in particular, concerning festival days findeth that in the explication of the first head of the first book of discipline it was thought good that the feasts of Christmas, Circumcision, Epiphany, with the feasts of the Apostles, Martyrs, and Virgin Mary be utterly abolished because they are neither commanded nor warranted by Scripture and that such as observe them be punished by Civil Magistrates. Here utter abolition is craved and not reformation of abuses only and that because the observation of such feasts have no warrant from the word of God.” – The Acts of the General Assemblies of the Church of Scotland, December 10, Session 17, 1638, pp. 37-38
Remember also these immortal words from Sharon M. Whitley: “Btw, if you want to see a large, lavish Christmas display in a mall… go to Dubai in the UAE! Many countries that are not Christian celebrate this holiday. That right there should tell Christians it’s not of God!”
P. S. Please don’t forget to celebrate the Holy Discernmentalist Holidays of Thanksgiving and Calvin’s Birthday in your churches and everywhere because these are not man-exalting semi-Pelagian Pagan Romanist made-up Holy Days invented by humans but Absolute Truth Biblical holidays commanded by God to be observed in the inerrant infallible Holy Discernmentalist Bible.
It grieves me that Todd Friel (Wretched) has caught yet another symptom of those heretical Postmodern Emergents: Pastor Worship. [Praise John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.)!] I mean just look at these idiots [Glory be to Spurgeon (the Prince of Preachers)!] here:
Jack Chick our most intelligent and sane researchmentalist also warns that agents of the Vatican have even infiltrated Protestant churches in order to attack the True Bible and pervert our Pure Doctrine. Remember also these instructions from our Holy Prophet (P. B. U. H.):
The Reformation doctrine of justification by faith is, and has always been, the number one target of the enemy’s attack. It provides the foundation of the bridge that reconciles God and man – without that key doctrine, Christianity falls. But the doctrine the Reformers so painstakingly clarified, even spilled blood over, has become so muddled today that many Protestants barely recognize it.
Sadly, there are some who react against a clear presentation of justification, calling it nothing more than useless hair-splitting. Some evangelical reactions to Protestant doctrine are even more severe. Recently, popular talk-show host, Marty Minto, was fired by evangelical station management for discussions he was having on his daily radio program. His crime? In response to callers, he was applying a traditional Protestant perspective to the teachings of John Paul II and the Roman Catholic Church.
AN OPEN LETTER TO EMPEROR AKIHITO OF JAPAN
From Jimmy Goddard (Youth-Pastor, Christian, American)
I speak for the LIVING GOD who answers prayers, and who stands in judgement over your godless nation. For thousands of years you have been ignoring the GOSPEL of JESUS CHRIST, and his sacrifice which cleansed our sins.
And now god’s vengence is been made clear – and yet you still defy him by “praying” to your pagan deities. ( http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-31749_16…-10391698.html ). I humbly call upon you to renounce your paganism, embrace Jesus Christ, the LAMB OF GOD and convert to Christianity.
I promise you with 100% certainty that if you were to give your heart to Jesus today God would instantly quench the satanic fires that rage in your nuclear reactors. But if you continue to defy God’s commandments let it be known that his wrath will make the events of the last few weeks seem as nothing. Your land will be torn asunder. Your nation and every godless thing you stand for will be destroyed.
Before you get all bent out of shape, please realize this is a satire site spoofing the so-called "discernment ministries" who deem themselves more worthy of Grace than the rest of us. So read and have fun! BTW, we are not against "good" discernment ministries that do actual real research and extend grace to others, only the bad ones.