New Little Blue Pill to pump up weaker ODM’s

May 13, 2009

 

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New Little Blue Pill to pump up weaker ODM’s

 

Public service announcement:

There are those like myself that are so greatly gifted in discernmentalism and some that need to be pumped up. Now for a limited time we are offering Dicermentalist Little Blue Pill!

 Yes, you can use this new discernmentalism enhancement to enhance that special part of yourself that needs that little extra. Impress the ladies… the church ladies that is! Bring down the biggest Seeker/PDL pastor in town with your remarkable judgmentalism!

 It all available in this little blue pill!

Here are some personal testimonies:

 Joe B: I was a weak minded liberal until I started taking “The little blue pill”. Soon I was a stark raving ditto head and was critical about everything! I ran into the local “woman” pastor and was able to beat her down easily with my new judgmentalism in a pill!

Sarah P: Since taking the Little Blue Pill, I found I have even a better ear for gossip! I now can hear gossip when it is not even there! I am so excited I am starting a blog called Those heretical emerging, seeker/pdl, non Calvinists bastards! They shall all burn in hell when I show them the truth of God’s love.

 Mike J: I had no stamina in debating emergents until I started taking The Little Blue Pill. I would run in to one in the coffee shop and begin to become confused with their intelligent conversations. I almost became persuaded one time to read a Brian McLaren book! Now, since I am taking the Little Blue Pill, I am making huge protest signs and using a blow horn to scream heretic outside the coffee shop. I was doing it in the coffee shop but the police arrested me… I am a real martyr now!

 Michelle L: I was an emergent heretic. I never missed a Rob Bell sermon and loved others. I was even convinced I could see God working and calling unbelievers. My mom made me take The Little Blue Pill and now I hate everyone! Thanks mom!

 Marvin G: I now like to kick puppies!

Yes, you also can have the power of judgment in your hands! Why should God have all the fun?

Disclaimer: The content in this page is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please contact your doctor before taking The Little Blue Pill. If you have hatred for more than four hours straight discontinue usage unless you want to be a real discernmentalist. Please do not confuse this with Viagra©


Power operators seem at peace with Discernmentalist greenhouse-gas limits

May 13, 2009

OLLIEOnline Discernmentalist Mafia has noted that ODM’s  release exhorbent amounts of greenhouses gases. Greenpeace leaked a statement to the news last week explaining that most Discernmentalists release an aweful lot of excess hot air.

ODMafia was NOT present at the time to rebuff this superfluous statement….but if we were there…we’d have given them a piece of our minds (unfortuantely we need everything we have for discernmentalism).


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