Online Discernment Restoration Plan Shrinks

May 26, 2009

Cypress Swamp

Several Online Discernmentalists announced Wednesday that Florida would significantly scale back its $125 000 dollar deal to restore those character assassinated by ODMs by purchasing 3 acres of swamp in honour of the many Christians bruised, crushed and devastated by misinformation.

At a news conference in Orlando, ODMs outlined a far more modest proposal: $10,000 for a 1/2 acre, with an option to buy the rest by 2019. ODMs suggest that he swamp land could be used for a number of purposes: Bigfoot watching, feeding alligators and fitting “friends” with cement shoes.

Numerous walking wounded were unsure of the ODM overture and were wondering if this was another ploy such as a straw man tactic.  ODMs were very clear before the news conference that there were NO straw men in the swamp. Newscasters around the world attempted to contact some of the larger ODMs  to clarify but they refused to talk to the media citing Liberal Media Bias.

ODMafia liked the idea of the purchased swamp land in compensation for our expert-like discernmentalism. While we do not regret a word we have ever said, we do regret that we had NOT spoken with a more haughty, arrogant spiteful tone to co-incide with a more biblical authoritarian style of setting you people right!


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