Slice of Laodicea (SoL) Builds Commune…Denies New Monasticism

SoL is so sickened over the state of the spiritual apostasy that they have decided to leave the world and join a commune. Our keen researchers have discovered that SoL has had enough of the “Purpose-Driven hirelings, Defenders of X-Rated Driscoll, America’s Spiritual Tower of Babel, the Usual Suspects, marketing blowout of  thinly disguised gathering for pastors, dreadlocks, left-wingers, socialism, suntans, spiritually aberrant speakers, emerging evangelical apostasy and people from New Jersey.”

SoL reportedly said (according to a neighbour) “we need to stay away from sinners, and Babble-on. We are the only remaining pure group in the world and therefore we need to remain so. “This is not New Monasticism…” a spokesman announced, “it is SoL’ism.” SoL has not announced where they will move to however they are considering three distinct places to avoid contamination; Utah, the moon or even Mars. The latter two will require technology from Take A Stand Ministries Bible Based Satellite (BS).