Have you ever gone to church and seen this guy? 
Or this guy?
Yes that is most likely an evil Emergent! They are entering “good” churches everywhere! Why should you have to feel like you are walking down a dark alley unprotected from muggers, theives and heretics that only want to steal your money freedom and pure doctrines? Now you can protect yourself with the Anti Emergent Mace Gun.
* The Anti Emergent Mace Gun also works on criminals, Arminians, small children that are bothering you during worship, pets, Muslim’s disorderly Elders, Liberals, Rick Warrenites, Caholics, wayward worship leaders, gays, lesbians, bi sexuals, transgender and metrosexuals as well as a seasoning for beef, pork and chicken. Keep out of reach of children and pets unless you intentionally desire to harm them. May discharge accidently. Do not aim at your own face unless you feel that you are becoming any of the before mentioned. Company is not responsible for your actions and stupidity.
This entry was posted on Tuesday, October 13th, 2009 at 10:17 am and is filed under Arabs, Arminians go to hell, Brannon Howse, CRN, Christian Research Network, Contempt, Couches and Candles, Dan Kimball, God save the queen, High tech stuff, Islam, John Macarthur, Judgement Day, Ken Silva, Lighthouse Trails, ODMafia, Post-modern, Post-modern unbelievers, Reconciliation?, Religious Police, Religious right = Christianity, Republicans are natural christians, Right-wing, Roman Catholic, Rush Limbaugh, STRETCH Technology, Science, Secret Order of the ODM, Self righteous, Sick / Illness, Slice of Laodicea, Spread the fear, Truthslayer approved / endorsed, Ways of the Master Discernmentalist, american gospel, bananas for Jesus, dirty hippies!, emergent, emergent village, emerging church, freakin' liberals!, gay, george clooney, ignorance is bliss, judging others for fun and profit, metrosexuals, milking goats for fun and profit, ministry, miracle grow plant food, purposeless driven life, setting the standard, spread the hate, technology, weird science. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
itodyaso
seymorespurgeon
truthslayer
Will Farel XV
donjobson
October 13, 2009 at 11:50 am |
I’ve seen some of these MALICIOUS characters in the past. Thank goodness for this all purpose anti-emergent pepper gun. I have been overrun with treacherous characters and need something like this at my side (besides my John MacArthur study bible) to feel safe and secure. If it wasn’t for ODMafa R & D where would we be?
October 13, 2009 at 12:42 pm |
Yes all God’s Only Inerrant Party Members carry these at all times along with our MacArthur Study Bibles, Scofield Reference Bibles and of course God’s Only Bible—the King James. We also have wallet sized pictures of John Calvin along with miniature statues of Servetus burning at the stake. These are effective deterrents in keeping away all those evil Emergents and other heretics.