Martin Luther King, Jr. may have had a dream but that dream was for a socialist and communist America and that’s heresy. John MacArthur and Todd Friel warn us about the falseness of the Socialist Gospel. It isn’t the True Gospel of God’s Wrath upon 99.9% of all of humanity. This is why True Americans and True Christians (Born Elect Republicans) should never take part in holidays dedicated to anti-American reprobates such as the heretic: Martin Luther King, Jr.
Are you tired of eating the same secular food as pagans, heathens and emergents? With the Bible Bar in your back pocket you can take scriptural sound food with you, even into the Lions Den and feel comfortable eating biblical sound food.
If you are a true discernmentalist or belong to God’s Only Inerrant Party then this is the ONLY true BIBLE food fit for you. %100 Absolute bible food, for a %100 Biblically accurate people like yourself.
Remember it contains food describe in Deut. 8:8. Be safe, eat biblically!
Ken Silva in another twist of fate has renamed the newly renamed Toxic Waste Ministries: Raw Sewage Ministries— in order to avoid Phil Johnson‘s wrath,snarky sneaky suspicions. Upon further discernmentalization our GOIP Bot 3000 has detected why—Ken Silva is secretly hiding the number 666 somewhere on the pages of his Blog-site. Here is photographic evidence of what clearly can be seen as containing the number 666—we have blown up the section that we believe WE KNOW contains the number 666 for further proof:
The only illogical conclusion that we can draw from this is that Ken Silva could be, probably, quite possibly, most definitely, certainly is the Anti-Christ or at least a possible candidate for the Anti-Christ elect. Is Ken Silva the Anti-Christ? Perhaps the world may never know.
In a rare moment Ken Silva (formerly of Annoying Ministries now newly renamed Toxic Waste Ministries) turns against himself. Here is the startling revelation that Ken has brought up against himself:
Quite frankly we are not surprised because sometimes we Discernmentalists must discernmentalize ourselves to insure that our Pure Doctrines are 100% Postmodernism and Emergent free.
WASHINGTON (Reuters) – Barack Obama will make his official statement next week which calls for global economies to use government spending to jumpstart Online Discernmentalist growth and work on a reshaping of the chaotic false teaching system of the world.
NATO (New Adherence (to) Truth Organization) related that they thought it was an Obama plot to take over the Online Discernmentalists Ministries world-wide and will refuse to take the money. “We believe that Obama has used his presidency as a chance to join the ranks of discernmentalists and destroy us from the inside” says NATO Officials.
Discernmentalists know this is to be an obvious left-wing plot to destroy true Republican Christians and all true ministry as we know it.
I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I’m all over that action. But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating. I may be evil incarnate, but I’m no welcher. The way you put it, making a deal with me leaves folks desperate and impoverished. Sure, in the afterlife, but when I strike bargains with people, they first get something here on earth — glamour, beauty, talent, wealth, fame, glory, a golden fiddle. Those Haitians have nothing, and I mean nothing. And that was before the earthquake. Haven’t you seen “Crossroads”? Or “Damn Yankees”? If I had a thing going with Haiti, there’d be lots of banks, skyscrapers, SUVs, exclusive night clubs, Botox — that kind of thing. An 80 percent poverty rate is so not my style.
Nothing against it — I’m just saying: Not how I roll.
You’re doing great work, Pat, and I don’t want to clip your wings — just, come on, you’re making me look bad. And not the good kind of bad. Keep blaming God. That’s working. But leave me out of it, please. Or we may need to renegotiate your own contract.
We have received inside news from our research robot monkeys that Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld did not lie about WMD! That’s right folks. We know this to be factually true…even if for the most part facts are irrelevant!!!
How do we know this?
The LEFTIES claimed Bush and his posse were lying so the reverse MUST be true.
You see the logic?
If LEFTIES say “WHITE” we know that the true-bible-believing-anti-postmodern-Republican knows it must be “BLACK.”
That is why millions of readers come to the ODMafia for first rate discernmentalism. That is why we support God’s Only Inerrant Party (GOIP). Besides….we do the thinking so you don’t have to.
Wise ole Saint Pat (but not in the Roman Catholic way as that would be idolatry) announced yesterday God’s Wrath upon Haiti:
Good for ole Pat stating the Absolutely True Reformed Truth War position on natural disasters being caused by God from the foundation of the world to punish the non-Elect reprobated heathens of the world. Haiti indeed deserved to be punished as the false religion of Roman Catholicism is professed by 80% of Haitians and the Absolute Reformed Truth of Protestantism makes up about 16% of the population. Also they have a bunch more devil worshipping voodoo witch doctors who are the same as Roman Catholics so we know with Absolute Certainty that Haiti is in league with the devil—for if they truly had God they would all be Reformed Discernmentalist American Republican Truth Warriors like us.
One of my all-time heroes of the faith. What a great man, and greatly used of God. Thank You, Lord, for Your servant, Pat Robertson, without whom we would be still struggling in the darkness of Roman Arminianism that man-exalting heresy, being Christ-like, bearing the Fruits of the Spirit, praying during tragedies, helping others as the Communists do and sharing compassion. Why Pat Robertson glorifies God by never compromising on preaching the Whole Discernmentalist Truth and is 100% Reformed because those ignorant Romanist Haitians deserve to be on the losing end of God’s Absolute Sovereignty— so I wish they would just suck it up because God can and does get His way as is His Will and He predestined from the foundation of the world to punish all those Haitians.
ODMafia Research and Design have come through again, this time selling Slice of Laodicea (a stalwart discernmentalist ministry – yet so humble they deny the label!!!!) a brand new truth grinder. The truth grinder is a carefully crafted device, upgraded from the older version truth grinder 1.0. The device is made up of several 30 ton, metallic wheels. When truth is inserted, the multi-ton wheels begin to grind, turn and twist until truth is pulverized. Truth is reconstituted in Slice of Laodicea’s own image. Rumours about that Lighthouse Trails, Herescope, Eric Barger’s Take a Stand Ministries, Apprising Ministries purchasing the upgrades are bound to be true.
Just think of this as a new spin on the same old crap!
The Truth Grinder is Dr. Truthslayer approved and designed!
We at the ODMafia are quite amazed with Discerning the World (DTW). We have always admired and aspired to be super Christians…uber-saints. We admire that DTW has apparently met these qualifications and is light-years ahead of other Christians. Amazing! Dazzling! Astounding. But that is why discernmentalists are at a calibre that is much higher than anyone else.
First that they admit following Jesus 100%….or at least expect everyone but themselves to follow suit. But that goes without saying, for we Discernmentalists loving piling great weight on the backs of others. It must be a good feeling.
Some day I’m going to make a Pilgramage to DTW. Not an unbiblical Roman Catholic Pilgramage but a Biblical one, so that my eyes may rest on true purity and holiness.
100% Pure! Remember to congratulate Discerning The World on this amazing achievement….
Before you get all bent out of shape, please realize this is a satire site spoofing the so-called "discernment ministries" who deem themselves more worthy of Grace than the rest of us. So read and have fun! BTW, we are not against "good" discernment ministries that do actual real research and extend grace to others, only the bad ones.
Posted by donjobson 
WASHINGTON (Reuters) – Barack Obama will make his official statement next week which calls for global economies to use government spending to jumpstart Online Discernmentalist growth and work on a reshaping of the chaotic false teaching system of the world.
