We are proud to present to you a moment from Discernmentalist Revised History uncut and uncensored: This is a tale about the Original Tea Partiers 4 Jesus and how they revolted against the Big Bad Government and the Big Name who stood against them and opposed them. The cast of characters include: a bunch of peasants (the Original Tea Partiers 4 Jesus), the Holy Roman Emperor (Big Brother) and the Big Name who stood with Big Brother against the Original Tea Partiers 4 Jesus—that Big Name of course is Martin Luther (evil Neo-Marxist Red-Letter Christian prototype).
At first Martin Luther (our anti-hero and anti-Reagan of this story) agreed that the Peasants (Tea Partiers 4 Jesus) deserved a break from their taxes especially those who were extremely wealthy by Medieval standards (meaning they privately owned at least one cow)—so all the Peasants (Tea Partiers 4 Jesus) drew up a plan to lobby for tax cuts for the richest and most wealthiest among them. I mean why should they have to share their privately owned cattle or any other privately owned property with the government that only protects them and makes them secure. Why should they have to share with anyone for that matter as sharing is Communism and as we all know:
The Bible mandates free market capitalism. It is anti-socialist. When Christianity adheres to the judicial specifics of the Bible, it produces free market capitalism.
On the other hand, when Christianity rejects the judicial specifics of the Bible, it produces socialism or some politically run hybrid “middle way” between capitalism and socialism, where politicians and bureaucrats make the big decisions about how people’s wealth will be allocated. Economic growth then slows or is reversed. Always.
To be continued in the next exciting part of our installments of Discernmentalist Revised History—stay tuned for the conclusion of our tale in Martin Luther Backs Socialists: Chapter The Second…
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Before you get all bent out of shape, please realize this is a satire site spoofing the so-called "discernment ministries" who deem themselves more worthy of Grace than the rest of us. So read and have fun! BTW, we are not against "good" discernment ministries that do actual real research and extend grace to others, only the bad ones.
DJ
donjobson
itodyaso
seymorespurgeon
truthslayer
Will Farel XV
I got my Doctorate in Discernmentalist
RevisionistHistory from Dr. David Barton’s Sound Bible Edumacational Institute For Tin-foiled Theology and Discernmentalist HistoricalRevisionismFantasyFacts. Now I canrevisepresentflawedhistory in support of any of our presuppositions and in favor of the foundations of our Pure Doctrines anytime I need to. I also canspinshow any historical figure to support any causeI wishthat we do or don’t support ourselves.Yes, that’s the true story; not those lies apouted by evil marx’s boyfriend (Friedrich Evingels), who thought of peasnts as revolutionaries of their time.
http://www.marxists.org/archive/marx/works/1850/peasant-war-germany/
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[...] Martin Luther Backs Socialists: Chapter The First [...]