Be Rapture-Ready for May 21, 2011!

May 17, 2011

Prepare for May 21st and be Rapture Ready with the Online Discernmentalist Mafia’s handy new RaptureHatch for the roofs of True Churches and the homes of True Regenerate Converts. Doomsday is soon approaching… Don’t get Left Behind with the unregenerate non-Elect heathens… Let John MacArthur confirm you in our Pure Truth War Doctrines and prove that you are indeed Rapture Ready and we’ll install a RaptureHatch on your roof today!

This site (an Online Discernmentalist Mafia partner site) reveals the most complete written, audio, and video Bible teachings which conclusively prove May 21, 2011 to be Judgment Day and The Rapture, and October 21, 2011 to be the end of the world. It is most urgent to examine yourself, whether you are of the Regenerate Elect and therefore are saved.

9 Comments | (Christian) Zionism, Abomination Nation, Absolute Biblical Truth, Absolutely Certain Truth, Alaska, aliens/UFOs, american gospel, Arminians go to hell, Brandon Howse, Brannon Howse, Camp of the Apostates, Canada, Cast of Hair, Christian Mystics from hell!, circular argument, coercion of faith, colon blow, Discerning the World, Discernmentalese, Discernmentalist Preparatory Test, Dividing the Sheep and goats., Don Jobson and Truthslayer approved, Doomsday, ear tickles, Easy-Believism, Ecumenical Jihad, Elect vs. non-Elect, False vs. True Converts, Illuminati, Illuminati Party, Inquisition, Judgement Day, judgemental, judging others for fun and profit, Left Behind, natural disasters (Wrath of God), NWO, Oath Smellers, Obamanation, Obey!, ODM Science, ODMafia, ODMU, Onward Christo-Fascist Soldiers!, osmosis, Outlaw all non-Christian religions, oxymorons, Premillenial Dispensationalism, pure, Pure Doctrines, Rapture believers, Sarah Palin---Yes! hubba hubba, The Conspiracy-Driven Church!, The Rapture, they will know we are Christians by our pure doctrine, Tim LaHaye, time is running out!, Time Machine, tinfoil hat theology, Us vs. them!, violence, wall builders live!, war not love, We are not bigots you reprobates., We are not idiots you reprobates., we are not like them!, We are not terrorists!, We are right because we are Right Wing!, We Are Robot Puppet Zombies On The Strings Of Our Angry Sovereign God Of Vengeful Wrath, Westboro Baptist, What Would John MacArthur Do?, will you make the final grade?, Will you make the grade?, windbags, windmills, wisdom, worldliness, worldly, WRATH not love, WWJMD? | Tagged: , , , , , | Permalink
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