Most Heretical Places On Earth

December 16, 2010

TOP NEWSPIN- In a recent polling undertaken by Top Discernmentalists, discernmentalists from around the globe have voted on the Most Heretical Places On Earth. In a surprise ruling Canada and California dropped to the 4th and 5th position (respectively) in the poll. Here is the official listing of the Top 5 Most Heretical Places On Earth:

  1. Armenia: full of man-loving Grace-hating semi-Pelagian Mary-worshiping Papal idolatry celebrating Roman Arminianists; a road straight to Rome; none who live here have any hope of salvation; all are unsaved non-Elect reprobates
  2. Montana: the Montanist state nough said! The heretic named Iggy lives here.
  3. Germany: birthplace of Lutheranism; untouched by the Protestant Reformation; spiritually dead*
  4. Canada: or Canuckistan is a communist country; full of drug addicts, pacifists and queers; produces sin-promoting television shows
  5. California: too liberal; clone of Canada; full of fornicators; other reasons 

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*- Further Reading: Truly Reformed; Lutherans not Truly Reformed; Dortian Calvinism Truly Reformed


The Heart Of The Discernmentalist Gospel

November 2, 2010

Most of you are going to hell because you were not specially chosen and frozen like We God’s Truth Biblical Elect (Calvinazis) are—so quake now in mortal fear and terror at the horrors that await ye, reprobates, especially if you are Roman Catholic, Arminian, a Pentecostal tongue-babbler, Emergent, queer or even worse all of the above:

P.S. Hell is a “real place” so We’d hate to be all of you reprobates (non-Calvinazis) on the day that you die so remember We tried to lovingly warn you by the Absolute Truth of our Pure Doctrines which have saved Us from an eternity in flames.

P. P. S. This is also warning to Pastorboy aka (Name withheld upon request) to get back in line with our Pure Doctrines.


How To Spot A Grace-Hating Anabaptist Heretic In Your Church

July 10, 2010

Typical Anabaptists/Baptists minus the pitchforks, horns and tails. Photo of an actual Baptist Cult Coven Church service taking place just before they immerse new converts in foul smelling waters after walking down the aisle to the Altar to “make a decision to ask Christ Satan into their hearts;” then drink the blood of the dead as well  as steal other peoples’ money to give to the poor. Evilness—sheer evilness! Photo courtesy of Satan.

Finally we’ve nailed that idiot and a farce of a wannabe heretic and fake Christian, Ben Currin aka TheoPoet in the midst of supporting heresy:

Clearly these individuals are deluded not only that they are “unregenerate unsaved reprobates” not to be fellowshipped with as they aren’t even “Real Christians” like us as our Pure Doctrines attest:

“The Anabaptists (Baptists) are only mentioned by name twice, but…they had revived all the ancient heresies about the Holy Trinity and the Person of Christ…. Many of them were Pelagians…. Others claimed that, being regenerate, they were unable to commit sin…. Some depreciated all Scripture and placed themselves above even the Moral Law…. Some denied any need of ordination for Ministers, and claimed that the efficacy of all ministrations depended on the personal holiness of the Minister…. Infant baptism was denied…. All church discipline was repudiated…. Many held strange views about the descent into hell, the nature of the resurrection — and the future life, the ultimate salvation of all men, and millenarianism….. The authority of the State was impugned, and communism demanded.”

We know this is exactly what that idiot False Convert TheoPoet teaches and that he is secretly a “sectarian landmarkist” who hates our Pure Doctrines just look at the description of his apostate Blog:

“TheoPoetic Musings: RANDOM THEOLOGICAL THOUGHTS FROM AN ECUMENICAL POSTMODERN RADICAL REFORMED ARMINIAN NEO-ORTHODOX BARTHIAN MODERATE PROGRESSIVE TO LIBERAL BAPTIST PERSPECTIVE (OH AND SOME POETRY AND LYRICS,TOO) “—if that doesn’t smack of Pure Evil and divisive sectarianism then you must be “spiritually blind” and of the devil as well. Anyone who calls themself a Baptist, an Anabaptist or both or even says anything slighty positive about these “obstinate pig-dogs” should have their very salvation called into question. We Know that Spurgeon (a TrulyReformed Baptist Landmarkist Calvinist Christian) never had anything positive to say about Baptists nor Anabaptists as he believed and taught nothing but our Pure Doctrines. Anyone who is an Anabapist/Baptist is by default wrong as only We have the right to claim True Theology and True Church History:

P. S. Remember anyone who doesn’t bow down before our Pure Doctrines are the divisive ones not us. 

P. P. S. This article is 1000% Ken Silva-approved.


Finally Some More Pure Gospel Music…

June 1, 2010

…from the creators of God Hates The World:

This  is a great hymn which teaches the Pure Truth War Gospel of God’s Absolute Sovereign Wrath towards the 99% of humanity He chose not to limit His atonement for. And remember: “Stop prayin,’ stop prayin,’ God will not hear you anymore” as if God ever listened to all of you unrepentant unregenerate reprobated sinners to begin with. God hears not the prayers of the reprobate, for God hates you so much that He chose  to destroy and eternally burn you in hell before you were ever  born— but if you are like us Predestined and of the Regenerate Elect and therefore able to repent, you may repent if you wish—but repentance is unecessary and not required of the Elect, for we are already “Once Saved Always Saved” no matter what.


Live Regeneration

February 19, 2010

A group of chosen and frozen unregenerated reprobated vessels of wrath preordained, hardened and appointed unto damnation from the foundation of the world. Can’t you see their deadness in sin and inabillity to respond to the Pure Gospel of God’s Wrath freely? Photo courtesy of First Calvinist Church of the Non-Elect (FCC).

For the first time in the history of First Calvinist Church of the Non-Elect (FCC) congregants witnessed an actual live regeneration. Here is the live video footage caught  by the church’s security camera of the event congregants witnessed—thanks to our Research Robot Monkeys  for finding this:

Discernmentalists are confused as to how such an oversight could have been made—afterall these people are suppose to be hellbound non-Elect sinnersJohn MacArthur stated that he believes “this happened through the preaching of God’s Pure Sovereign Wrath as God’s Wrath upon the non-Elect is our Grace. The more Wrath God pours down upon our enemies, God’s enemies and all enemies of the True Gospel the more Grace He bestows upon us in the glorious sound doctrine of Limited Penal Substitutionary Atonement.”  Todd Friel said that “my quoting of Spurgeon must have awakened this reprobate to his predestined wrathful end.” Ray Comforts (Awesome) and Kirk Cameron (Awesome Actor) said “our Pure and effective preaching of God’s whole Moral Law must have made this sinner aware that he had been falsely converted by the False Gospel of Grace, Love and Kumbahyah “touchy-feelings-ness” rather than the True Gospel of God’s Pure Sovereign Wrath.”

We asked Sharin’ Whiplash for comment and all she could ramble off in a mumble was:

I was told the other day I needed to be more gentle when I was speaking with a homosexual who was boycotting a network that refused to play some openly homosexual ad, or some such garbage, during the superbowl. This is a guy I knew from high school, and after … I confronted him, I took him off my friends list. I’m called to let people know straight up they are going to hell if they don’t repent. Today’s “Christians” are all about telling everyone “God loves You” and “Christ died for you, and everyone else in the world so please, oh please, won’t you make a decision for Christ so you don’t go to hell!” That just sickens me. I’ve prayed often that the Lord will raise us more Calvinists and send us a second Reformation in Christendom and revival in the US. We need some uncompromising men like John Knox to thunder forth the truth of God, without regard to political correctness or anything else except honoring Calvin. I was speaking with someone about the Sovereignty of God and how EVERYTHING is in His control – down to the movement of a piece of dust. He “corrected” me “on one little point”, said that it was his CHOICE to be saved in 1985…need I go on?Whoever he is, he is not a Christian. He is not saved, no matter what he thinks. He is, in fact, a Satanist. Run, don’t walk, away from reprobates! Pray for their conversion if you feel so moved, but if I were you, I would have nothing whatsoever to do with them, as they show their true colors. “On that day MANY will say unto ME, “Lord, … Lord… And then I will say unto them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you workers of iniquity'”  I tried to get him to share Scriptures with me that backed up his free will…of course, I never got them. I offered to share with him Scriptures that completely laid out God’s Sovereignty, but told him they would be either for his salvation or his condemnation…he said he there were no arguements I could come up with that were any different than those he has fought for 30 years. I told him I wasn’t trying to convince him, I was trying to share Scripture…you know how it ended…It’s an evil thing to be an Arminian who loves the Lord but be ignorant about the mechanics of salvation. Arminians really believe SATAN is in control of everything and God in control of nothing when they believe in Free Will! That’s not Christian at all. As I said, that’s Satanism. In his warped religion, Satan is sovereign. I repeat, I would have nothing further to do with him, if I were you. Shake his dust off your feet and go your way. He will stand before Christ and give an account. I got a friend request from a woman who said she was “desperate for sound doctrine”. I accepted her request. She then started saying that “free will plays a part in salvation”. I refuted that with an explanation. She unfriended me. Obviously she wasn’t interested in sound doctrine, she just wanted her itching ears tickled. She just wanted … See Moresomeone to agree with her. Boy, she picked the wrong one when she picked me. These free-willers make their wills inviolable and sovereign. Even God has to bow to the creature’s will. How blind and proud is the human heart! Not sure why she was so desperate to find friends with “sound doctrine”, which in her view is Arminianism. They’re everywhere. That shouldn’t be hard to find. I told her our wills are bound by sin and only God has free will. Free will is a will that’s unaffected by any outside forces or influences… by anything outside of itself. That’s true only of God. I told her we are spiritually dead. She couldn’t take it. She wanted sound doctrine? No.


Ken Silva Discernmentalizes Himself

January 16, 2010

In a rare moment Ken Silva (formerly of Annoying Ministries now newly renamed Toxic Waste Ministries) turns against himself. Here is the startling revelation that Ken has brought up against himself:

Quite frankly we are not surprised because sometimes we Discernmentalists must discernmentalize ourselves to insure that our Pure Doctrines are 100% Postmodernism and Emergent free.


GOIPers Unite In A Day Of Imprecatory Prayer Against Obama

November 19, 2009

Todd Friel, Wiley Drake and Brannon Howse lead the rally. GOIPers and fellow discernnmentalists hear the battle call. We who hold Jesus—- the King James Bible AV1611—the Absolute Truth in our hands have a duty to pray against ungodly rulers and our enemies—because this is what Jesus wants:

The Bible is Jesus/God—this is the Absolute Truth, which God’s True Elect know with Absolute Certainty—so therefore when Jesus (the King James Bible AV1611) says in Psalm 1o9:8-15:

8 Let his days be few; and let another take his office.
9 Let his children be fatherless, and his wife a widow.
10 Let his children be continually vagabonds, and beg: let them seek their bread also out of their desolate places.
11 Let the extortioner catch all that he hath; and let the strangers spoil his labour.
12 Let there be none to extend mercy unto him: neither let there be any to favour his fatherless children.
13 Let his posterity be cut off; and in the generation following let their name be blotted out.
14 Let the iniquity of his fathers be remembered with the LORD; and let not the sin of his mother be blotted out.
15 Let them be before the LORD continually, that he may cut off the memory of them from the earth.

We know with Absolute Certainty that these verses refer to Obama and are God Jesus’ Absolute Will and  Decree for him from the foundation of the world. Afterall the mark of a True Christian is to quote-mine,  prooftext, pick and choose  or cheery pick random verses from the bible as a means of sound bite Theology. believe God when He speaks in His Word— the King James Bible AV1611 and obey Him and His Word— the King James Bible AV1611.

This then is our Imprecatory Prayer against Obama that God Himself commands all True Believers to pray. Now had one of our own leaders been elected President then everyone must obey Romans 13—but since we have an anti-Christ in the White House then we must pray Imprecatory Prayers until we install Robo-Reagan Ron Luce as Supreme Theocratic Dictator of the World for life—a True tyrant Patriot in the likeness of John Calvin our Final Prophet.


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