Discerning, Concerning, and Unlearning

March 28, 2011

(Insert evil I’m-smarter-than-you-laugh-here). As I languished in the bowels of AM radio, striving, yearning, for my big break I continually proclaimed the true biblical interpretation; T.U.L.I.P. Over and over again I walked the Romans Road always reminding people that they were wretched sinners who God was going to smite for His pleasure and Glory. But at every turn I was rebuffed. Deep down (actually really close to the surface) I knew this trial was actually God blessing me for my suffering, for it is written, “the World will hate you because of me”. AMEN! Hated I was but alas, I am now where my gifts will be used by God and appreciated…ODMafia.

A few things about me:

DISCERNING: Anything that doesn’t agree with my theological understandings is wrong. It will save a lot of debate in the comment section if you all understand that EVERYTHING I say is right. For I have the gift of DISCERNMENT.

CONCERNING: I find it concerning that the evangelicalism sweeping this great Nation of of ours is being overrun with weak theology. It’s my goal…err…MISSION to bring US back. Therefore it is mandatory before I take you seriously in dialog you must pass the following True or False quiz:

1) There is only one true God.
2) There is only one true prophet of God
3) That prophet is John Calvin
4) Calvins Institutes are also God-Breathed and useful for instruction.
5) You agree with everything I say

If you answered False to any of those questions we shall have no fellowship for it is written “And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.”  Biblically speaking I can have no fellowship with you. All to God’s Glory.

UNLEARNING: I understand that many have been exposed to the damnable heresies of Brian McLaren, Tony Jones, Doug Pagitt, Rob Bell, Greg Boyd, Billy Graham, Robert Schuller, et al. So it’s my goal to UNLEARN all those things in the minds of my readers. My suggested reading list for anyone interested in true biblical scholarship and knowledge:
King James Version 1611 ~ As its been rightfully pointed out “If it was good enough for Paul, it’s good enough for me”. HAPPY 400th Birthday KJV!

Anything and Everything written by John McArthur (PBUH).

Apostles Creed: The original not the revised
Canons of Dordt
The Heidelberg Catechism
Calvin Institutes

Finally, A big heart-felt, thank you to the ODMafia for allowing me this opportunity to spread the True Gospel Message.

God Speed!


The Heart Of The Discernmentalist Gospel

November 2, 2010

Most of you are going to hell because you were not specially chosen and frozen like We God’s Truth Biblical Elect (Calvinazis) are—so quake now in mortal fear and terror at the horrors that await ye, reprobates, especially if you are Roman Catholic, Arminian, a Pentecostal tongue-babbler, Emergent, queer or even worse all of the above:

P.S. Hell is a “real place” so We’d hate to be all of you reprobates (non-Calvinazis) on the day that you die so remember We tried to lovingly warn you by the Absolute Truth of our Pure Doctrines which have saved Us from an eternity in flames.

P. P. S. This is also warning to Pastorboy aka (Name withheld upon request) to get back in line with our Pure Doctrines.


Trish Of Way Of The Master Emerges Into The Emerging Apostasy Of Emergent Heresy

June 16, 2010

 

Lately our Research Robot Monkeys have been hard at work discernmentalizing all who stand in our way and in the way of God’s Truth. Our ever-vigilant, ever-valiant Research Robot Monkeys who are always watching out for heresy with their ever-keen mechanical eyes have been exposing a lot of turncoats in our midst on a daily basis. Why just recently they caught Chris Rosebrough aiding and abetting a secret agent of the New World Order and even more recently they’ve caught Trish of Way Of The Master fame supporting the heretical Sinner’s Prayer formula but wait it gets much worse than that Trish also has been caught telling readers of her site to “meditate” on a Bible verse not only that but she added to the Word of God. Our Research Robot Monkeys have caught it all here and have exposed it for all the world to see:

This is just as bad as when our Research Robot Monkeys caught Chris Rosebrough quoting from the Brian McLaren endorsed Roman Catholic apostate G. K. Chesterton. Why is asking someone to meditate on a Bible verse so evil you may ask—why it may lead someone to slip into taking on the Emergent practice of meditation aka “Lectio Divina” or worse than that they may even take on the New Age practice of chanting. Lectio Divina of course is defined as:

Lectio Divina is Latin for divine reading, spiritual reading, or “holy reading,” and represents a traditional Christian practice of prayer and scriptural reading intended to promote communion with God and to increase in the knowledge of God’s Word. It is a way of praying with Scripture that calls one to study, ponder, listen and, finally, pray and even sing and rejoice from God’s Word, within the soul.

Now you can see why such a practice is so evil and blasphemous as our affectionate Uncle the great Pastor-Teacher-Scholar Ken Silva’s clear teachings profess. This is why no True Bible-Believing Christian ever meditates on the Bible. All the True Bible Believing Christian has to do is read a Bible verse once in a non-contextualized way and then they are able to grasp the Absolute Truth of it with such Absolute Clarity and Absolute Certainty that there is little room for misunderstanding. However if there is a small inkling of misunderstanding, all the True Bible Believing Christian has to do is consult the handy reference of John MacArthur’s Bible Commentaries©®™ for instant comprehension of the True meaning of the verse in question. 

Now you can also see why we are also disappointed with Trish for slipping into Emerging heresy. However this is not a total shock as Dr. Seymore Spurgeon caught Ray Comforts (Awesome) of Way Of The Master in the actual act of practicing the New Age ritual of Lectio Divina as for Trish’s adding to the Word of God all we have to say is hath not God said in His  Inerrant and Infallible Word the Bible: “5 Every word of God proves true; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him. 6 Do not add to his words, lest he rebuke you and you be found a liar.” [Proverbs 30:5-6 (ESV)]


Sarah Palin: Conservoporn Playmate!

February 15, 2010

Sarah Palin (Yes!  hubba hubba Awesome) to become the newest Conservoporn playmate. Watch as she saves America from the threat of Red Letter Christians and evil Emergents like Brian McLaren. She even puts Obama in his place. All in conservatively appropriate clothingSarah Palin (Yes!  hubba hubba Awesome) is a true Discernmentalist after the hearts of all Reaganolater Reagan loving GOIP Discernmentalists. In fact we’ve heard that Sarah Palin(Yes!  hubba hubba Awesome)  is a female clone of our Final President Ronald Reagan.

A key scene in one of Sarah Palin(Yes!  hubba hubba Awesome)’s Conservoporn productions Slaying Neo-Marxist Red Letter Christian Wolves: Tax Cuts For The Filthy Rich Turn Me On —-

Look for the official Glenn Beck Seal Of Approval on all of our excellent and quality Conservoporn productions:


Counteract Brian McLaren’s New Book By Buying Ours Instead

January 27, 2010

Brian McLaren’s worthless book:

Our Book—Priceless:

Just like we were not happy with Brian McLaren’s book A Generous Orthodoxy….we are not happy with his new  book either….eventhough it is yet released….We Know it is full of heresy especially because we are a discernmentalist ministry and stand for true Absolute biblical truth. This is why we’ve gotten John MacArthur and Todd Friel to write our version of  his new book before it even comes out after using Eric Barger’s time machine to spot all the heresy in Brian’s book .

Also, you may have heard of this phrase from the Reformation: “Ecclesia reformata semper reformanda—The Church should be reformed and always reforming.” Well using Eric Barger’s time machine again—we’ve found that  none of the Reformers said that. This is why we must oppose Brian’s new book with a Holy Angry Passion as those Emergents are always trying to reform our Absolute Truth, our Pure Churches and our Pure Doctrines. We also believe that Reformed Emergent/Emerging House Churches do not exist. Reformed  and Emergent  are oxymorons as Ken Silva teaches therefore there are no such creatures as Reformed Emergents because Ken Silva is always right. This is always why we stand by our reformatted Reformation motto: “Semper 1600’s—Always 1600’s always”—that’s right because we’ve discovered all the Truth we need to know about God in the 1600’s. There is nothing else about God that needs to be revealed to us—the Reformers and the King James Bible revealed everything about God to us—so we must always stay in the 1600’s and think like they did in the 1600’s as well.

Dr. Don Jobson, Dr. Truthslayer and Dr. I. Todyaso—Sola 1600’s (1600’s alone).


Brian McLaren Directly Assaults Discernmentalists

December 3, 2009

Discernmentalists, we are under direct attack on a daily basis. We need to rally to arms and put on the aggressive defense. Just last month Brian McLaren directly assaulted Uncle Ken Silva and Aunt Ingrid Schlueter of Slice Of  Laodicea. Ingrid was caught yelling in a headlock:

What an appallingly dishonest way to deal with your critics, McLaren.

which  inspired her to write this scathing critique of her ordeal:

Brian McLaren Paints Critics as Gay-Hating Bigots

by Ingrid Schlueter

Emergent author Brian McLaren doesn’t believe in a literal Second Coming of Jesus. He has problems with the penal substitutionary atonement of Jesus on the cross. A literal hell with eternal torment for those who reject Christ? Not likely. The Genesis account of the fall of man? Not true. But instead of addressing his own spiritual rebellion, Brian appears to want to paint his critics as bigots. In a recent blog post, McLaren demands that what he calls “discernment websites” (he used the quote marks) address an African country’s attempts to codify severe penalties for homosexuality into law. He seems to imply that these same “discernment ministries” would automatically support the arrest and execution of gays by Uganda.

For the record, Brian, that’s a pretty nasty strategy to use against those who point to your heretical doctrinal views. While emergents supposedly are intellectual, open-minded people who enjoy conversations with subtle nuances and lots of mystery, McLaren actually sees things in black and white. Anyone who is not willing to jettison cardinal doctrine and embrace his “new kind of Christianity” is painted as ready to commit hate crimes and would support mistreating gays. What an appallingly dishonest way to deal with your critics, McLaren.

Ken was found wounded in the fray but not hurt. We asked him for comment and all he could murmur was:

It’s interesting this “minister” would place quotations around “discernment websites.” Well, as one of said sites, I can tell McLaren that I personally do not at all “enjoy featuring and critiquing the work” of any of these postliberal rebels against the final authority of God’s Word. The Lord knows that I’d much rather go back to apologetics and evangelizing those lost in the kingdom of the cults.

Indeed this is why we must go back on the aggressive defense and never compromise on preaching the whole ‘discernmentalist’ truth to all liberal, apostate, heretics!


Mike Morrell’s Romanist Leanings

November 23, 2009

If ye haven’t read my first post exposing Mike do so or else. The second thing that concerns us about Mike Morrell’s post is Mike’s Romanist leanings. Ken Silva is quoted as saying:

What utter and complete blasphemy. May the Lord reveal Himself to you and open your eyes to the idol you have created and now worship. May He remove the veil of ignorance that you blissfully revel in but that holds your soul in condemnation.

Editors’ Note: We of God’s Truly Chosen Elect don’t have idols you know.

Indeed we of the Online Discernmentalist Mafia and the GOIP are saying an Imprecatory Prayer against Mike’s evilness. What is so evil about Mike you may ask besides saying that God changes—why he supports Contemplative Spirituality which is nothing more than Romanism repackaged—the deformation of  Protestant Christianity if you will. Anyways, here is an incriminating quote from Mike Morrell’s post:

Part of the ‘inner reflex’ is Centering Prayer is letting go. For 20 minutes twice a day, it’s a continuous letting go of thoughts and emotions that well up inside – kind of like a fisherman catching fish but not to eat – just for fun. He’s sitting in a boat (the mind) and his pole rests in the water (the field of consciousness). Little fish (thoughts, ideas, emotions) come up and nibble on the line (ordinary awareness) – the fisherman doesn’t shoot the fish with a revolver or cut the line. Instead, he pulls the little fish up, but doesn’t keep them in the boat – it’s catch & release.

Catch and release, catch and release, gently, graciously – because you recognize that even the lake is situated in a much larger ecosystem (God). You can let go because the earth is abundant; you will be fed. Centering Prayer is a journey of trust in God, even on the unconscious level, where all kind of mis-trustful thoughts bubble up to the surface. The life centered in surrender to & trust in God is a life of profound peace and productivity – and our Scriptures attest, in a myriad of ways, that such trust (faith) ‘pleases God.’ But when we’re faced with the disturbing truths that Brueggemann elucidates – God’s irascibility for instance – what do we do?

There are two ways to do handle this. One is the way of definitive, forceful – almost violent – denial that there is (or has ever been) anything troubling in God’s character or actions. It’s the route of trusting God via suppression.

But there is another route – more painful, more adult, more complex – but I think it can still end in deeply-rooted, childlike trust. It’s a path that I’ve learned from many guides over the years, including Bruggie Baby (sorry for the familiarity, but it’s really hard typing his name over and over again), Meister Eckhart, the Jewish scholar Richard Elliot Friedman in The Hidden Face of God, Jack Miles in his Christ: A Crisis in the Life of God, ‘deeper life’ missionary and teacher Norman Grubb, and the process theologians that Tripp Fuller is getting me to read (like his professor Philip Clayton of Transforming Theology) or listen to & he and Chad Crawford’s uber-awesome podcast Homebrewed Christianity – all refined in the daily, simple crucible (quite actually) of centering prayer as taught by Contemplative Outreach and particularly Cynthia Bourgeault. (Did you read that paragraph, Ken Silva? It was practically tailor-written for you, LOL. If you don’t write about me, Discernmentalist Mafia will!)

My fellow colleague in discernmentalizations Dr. Truthslayer has this to add about Mike’s Emergent Romanism:     

ODMafia went on the prowl….we sent our research robot monkeys behind the scenes to find the authentic Emergent Church (EC). …What did we find?….Among other  things that have been discovered (as suggested in previous posts)….we spotted couches, candles and sometimes left-over coffee cups (often left in the recycled bin which suggests that they are Earth worshipers). Surely this has new age undertones.

Anyways, we all know with Absolute Certainty that candles in church=Romanism. And that’s Mike Morrell, a Romanist—we have Absolute Proof:

Mike Morrell caught sinning by drinking alcohol and with the Pope at that.

Mike Morrell exposed as a Romanist/Papist pope and idol worshipping heretic.


Red Letter (non)-Christian And Emergent Holiday

November 7, 2009

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Tony Campolo and some evil Emergents burn our flag and cross while raising the Red banner of Obama in celebration of November 7th.

Today and Sunday all Red Letter non-Christians and Emergents will celebrate an evil anti-Christian holiday—non holy day is more like it. Today being:

 November 7: October Revolution Day in Belarus and other various regions of the former Soviet Union because on 1917Vladimir Lenin led a Bolshevik insurrection against the Provisional Government of Alexander Kerensky, starting the Bolshevik Revolution, the second phase of the overall Russian Revolution.

And we know that those evil Red Letter Christians and Emergents wish the same thing for our God Ordained and Chosen Nation since all of them are Obama supporters—just listen to the evil anthem they plan on singing this  Sunday:

Blasphemy sheer blasphemy—we tell you! Here are trustworthy and official GOIP Internet Encyclopedia has discernmentalized and exposed us to Emergent and Red Letter Christian propaganda for this evil and dreadful day: 

RedLetteredHoliday

More Emergent and Red Letter Christian propaganda:

Obama-Commie-Blogger

RedLetterChristianFlag

obamunism

Don Jobson—beware of the Red letters.


Interview with a vampire (heretic)

February 29, 2008

glass-of-water.jpg

The good people over at CRN have done it again!  Just when I thought they had exhausted their sizable reach, they turn up yet another article about Brian McLaren (heretic).  How do they do it?  Their staff must consist of literally tens of people searching through news journals, newspapers and the internet to find stories that mean something to me.  Well done CRN!

Now on to the article.  If you take the time to read it, and I mean with the discernmentalist eye, you will find heretical remarks all through Brian McLaren’s (heretic) comments.  First he says that Jesus would use a Blackberry?  Are you kidding me?  Jesus is God and God doesn’t need a puny electronic device to remember what he is going to do.  So Brian McLaren (heretic) is mocking our Lord.  Also, he says that Jesus would be concerned with the planet and homeless people.  As John MacArthur points out,

 “That salt and light are not moral influence, but gospel witness and the power of holy living. They always say well, we have to be salt and light, we have to be salt and light, have to be salt and light. Well, the imagery of Jesus in the sermon on the mount with regard to salt and light is the image of the shining forth of truth. That’s the light. And the preservative of godly living. We are light when we proclaim the light, and manifest our good works. That’s what He says. And glorify our Father who is in heaven. And we are salt when we are a preservative, because of the virtue and the godliness of our lives.”

In another place John MacArthur states it this way;

“He (Jesus) did not seek social change.”

 To quote C. H. Spurgeon Himself;

“Well, it is the tendency of the times to decry preaching, but it is “the foolishness of preaching” which is to change the world.”

 In Other words Jesus didn’t come to change the world or to worry about the homeless (paraphrase is mine).  So how can Brian McLaren (heretic) sit there and tell us to take care of the homeless.  Not only that, but he contradicts his whole emerging thought process by saying he wouldn’t give someone money, just talk to him and love him.  I thought you cared for the homeless Brian!

I will wrap this up with my views.  It is up to Ken Silva to keep this heretic’s schedule in the forefront of our minds.  I personally don’t want to go to a bookstore and run into him.  That would make me feel dirty.  And all you who know the TRUTH know that Brian McLaren (heretic) is a heretic and so he is not allowed to say anything about Jesus.  As CRN rightly points out, “he probably doesn’t even know the Lord.”  And how could you when you are more worried about the planet, the homeless, poverty, world peace and religious understanding, then pointing out other people’s sins?  This is a no-brainer people! 

I am glad God didn’t make me like them!

Dr. Seymore Spurgeon


Starbucks is an emergent church like entity

February 26, 2008

starbucks-logo-copy.gif

We here at the Online Discernmentalist Mafia see a parallel with Starbucks shutting down for three hours to re-train its employees, with the emergent/seeker movement in the church.  Starbucks feels like it is losing its way, while we know that the emergent church has already lost its way.  Starbucks is worried about the competition of McDonald’s and Dunkin Donuts, while the emergent church is worried about being part of the post-modern culture.  Starbucks started serving breakfast and accommodating everyone, while the emerging church takes in everyone,  while they are still sinning. 

We here will not take three hours of to re-train, since we need no re-training.  God has given us everything we need in the form of inerrant scripture that has been validated by various people including Ken Silva, John MacArthur, and the pyro-guys.  Paul told us to pray without ceasing and that doesn’t mean to take three hours off, like the emergent church guys would do.    We will stand on the street corners and preach how everyone who hears us is a sinner, especially those who would “call” themselves Christians, for they are the worst, and we won’t take three hours off.  We will work the Way of the Master formula to perfection since it is the only approved way of evangelism and is taken straight from the approved versions of the most inerrant scriptures.  We will not take three hours off.  We have TRUTH on our side and so we can’t lose.  Let those emergent “churches” take time off to train and learn new things, let them do new sermon series, let them have Starbucks coffee in their church, and let God rain down his fire to those wolves in sheep’s clothing.  I don’t want to be anywhere around when God’s wrath comes down on those sinners, who think they are fine because they love everyone and follow Christ’s example, in the form of fire and sulfur.  Many churches will be in flames on that day and pillars of salt will litter the landscape as these “Christians” look back on their homosexually loving churches. 

We will not take three hours off because God shines his light on the defenders of his TRUTH, which could be compromised if we take three hours off.

May the peace of Christ be with you, and all who think like me.

Dr. Seymore Spurgeon


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