Mr Todyaso Can you Help me?

I get asked questions all the time because of my keen gift of decernmentalism. Often I am amazed that I do not know the answer but have the supernatural ability to come up with one.  Recently a person (whom I hid the identity of so I will not embarrass them) asked this question.

 

David Mullett Says:
February 13, 2008 at 4:16 pm 

Mr Todyaso,

Can you help me? I keep a five o’clock shadow full face beard on occasion. Is that evil?

 

David,

We all know God has a beard. So i assure you that as far as a beard you are fine. Every movie I have seen Jesus in, He also had a beard, blues eyes and light skin and dark hair.

If Jesus and God had beards, I think again that we can as we were made in God’s image and look just like Him.

 Often when I look in the mirror and see my fat belly and sagging pecks I take comfort in knowing that God is older so his belly must be fatter and His pecks more saggy.

god_creating_adam.jpg

Now, we need be careful as to what type of beard we grow.

 

Take this one for instance.

 shane_stern1.jpg

This is one of the Emergent leaders Shane Claiborne.  I have written extensively on him in my well researched massive called Why Shane Claiborne is not saved.

 

Notice how he looks like this guy?

baphomet.gif

 Scary huh?

There are many good beards out there that we can choose from, yet again we must make sure we are not combining Rastafarian hair (hair of false religions) with satanic goatees.

Here are some good beard styles. Notice mostly that with a nice hair cut, most beards that are maintained are acceptable.

beards.png

Here is an example of what Jesus would look like today. Actually, Jesus would have shorter hair and possible male pattern balding. This would be more for the church youth group style to look hip for the kids when preaching God’s wrath as he was sent to do.

 jesus-a3.jpg

Yet, if we are to be most faithful to those great men that came before us and preached the Gospel of Grace with anger and wrath that is true of our God we would grow a beard like this.

charles_haddon_spurgeon.jpg or like this. images.jpg

 

But as long as you stay away from this, warren.jpg God will accept you.

Be true to what the bible teaches and you will be saved. Levitcus 19:27 should answer all your questions.

I want you to know, brothers, that the gospel I preached is not something that man made up,

I. Todyaso

 

 

 

 

 

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12 Responses to Mr Todyaso Can you Help me?

  1. David Muller says:

    Thankyou Mr Todyaso. Truly your discermentalist abilities benefit the few of mankind that God loved enough to elect.

  2. I have a soul patch (that little triangular thingy under my lip) …what kind of discernment should I apply in this case?

  3. itodyaso says:

    TG,

    I looked over this truly God inspired post and could not see “soul patch”, So, I suggest that you shave it immediately as it sounds like something an emergent hookah smoking hippy would wear. I know it is tough to not be snookered into today’s style, but we must hold true to OUR DOCTRINE of the Truth War.

    If it that you are just young, I would allow you to come to my church once but if it is not gone by the next time you came I would not let you in unless you shaved it before service. God does not want us to have the appearance of evil so if you cannot handle the Truth as we see it, then you will have to hand in you ESV and any John MacArthur commentaries immediately.

    My prayers are with you,

    I. Todyaso

  4. Luke says:

    Jesus clearly tells us in the “New Testament” That its not what goes into a man that defiles him, but what comes from within his heart! With that being said, it does not matter what kind of beard you wear, or clothes, or jewelry, what matters is this Is your heart right with the Lord, do you attempt to keep his commandments, Love the Lord your god with all of your heart, Mind, and Soul. #2 Love your neighbor as you love yourself, neighbor meaning people you come across in life not the guy living next door!

  5. Luke says:

    Something else to consider, Jesus came to this world to heal the sick not the righteous. People that are living in sin are the sick, If we turn away “sick” people from the church where will they find salvation and forgiveness of sins? The people of Jesus’s time were about to stone a women for an immoral issue. Jesus told the men “Whoever is without sin cast the first stone.” All the men dropped their stones and left!

  6. truthslayer says:

    Luke, we recommend you reconsider worrying MORE about facial hair and stop worry about the sick.

  7. eon viola says:

    Wow you are dumb you have no truth in you. You worker of the devil.

    • itodyaso says:

      Yes, I am DUMB and you also can be a Dicernmentalist Under My Beliefs. And as Luther once stated, even the Devil is God’s Devil… I mean if you are a real Christian who follows Calvin, then you know God created the devil and is behind giving him permission to do anything. So really I am obeying God. So have some symapthy for me, as I think what’s bothering you is the nature of my game.

  8. [...] about beards so our very own Dr. I. Todyaso wrote a award winning massive on the subject of Bible-Based Beards which gets hit up very often by those wanting to learn the Absolute Biblical Truth about beards. [...]

  9. that devil picture is cool

  10. sb says:

    My good man, your power of discernment is a wee bit unfaithful in at least one particular area. It is a small thing, but I am sure that you would agree even small things are worthy of one’s attention. My problem is with the Van Dyke you have presented in your chart. As you can see here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Van_Dyke_beard apart from from being devilishly handsome, it is not connected to his *poof* (What a hateful term for a man (or some men at least).)

    I’m not asking you to change anything, just making a small footnote for history. Cheers mate and may Luther not nail anything to your doors.

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