John Piper Swears During Sermon!

April 1, 2008

When I first heard this sermon I was going to state how much of a Godly man John Piper is. Then I heard him swear. Instantly I lost my sanctification and dropped to my knees and repented for thinking those thoughts about John Piper and for hearing such foul language. I see his message, which started out great, was one that I could not even finish as it was so offensive because of its language! This is proof of the infection of the emerging emergents that are out there swearing in every sermon they do! We can thank Mark Driscoll and Tony Jones for influencing once godly men like John Piper and leading them to lose their sanctification.

 Now, before you worry, I confessed for an hour per letter in that four letter word and now I am pure again.

 (Oh crap! I just listened to the sermon again as I tried to post it to make sure it works… now I need go and repent again!)

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God,

 I. Todyaso

In Madge We Trust!

April 1, 2008


Fellow Laodiceans, 

I think it is safe to say that we can all rest easily in the knowledge that, as it turns out, Madonna is on our side. This is comforting to me. We live in a scary world full of all sorts of pseudo-preacher types. But I take great encouragement that Madonna is, according to this report, preaching the Good News. She was overheard to say:

“For me we all need to be Jesus in our time,” the 48-year-old singer/actress/humanitarian said.

It is important that we fear, and reject, and recoil at the preaching of most–folks like Eugene Peterson (radical contemplative), JK Rowling (radical imagination), CH Spurgeon (radical calvinist), Martin Luther (radical anti-semite) and many, many others. But I think it is safe to say that we can trust Madonna. After all, she is named after The Virgin–how can she be wrong? And she is British and nothing bad ever comes from London.

Many of you are struggling to find a preacher you can listen to and trust. I understand your angst and that is the point of this post: Go to Madonna. Her mouth is full of nothing speaks nothing but jolly old English Cheer and godspel. And she is not, I stress this: Not, radical about anything. How can we wrong with someone named after The Virgin?

I hope this helps. For your convenience, Madonna’s sermons are available at Itunes and at your local National Record MartWal-Mart or through BMG. They are conveniently packaged in jewel cases and are available on CD or Cassette and sometimes, for you purists, on Vinyl (sorry, no 8-Tracks available as of this writing). Also, for your worship pleasure, the sermons are set to music and if you look hard enough, you might find a video version at youtube or on VH1: Hits of the 80’s. I recommend her greatest hits: Pappa Don’t Preach, Like a Prayer, Like a Virgin, Angel and Sanctuary. You are sure to grow in some sort of faith.


HT: Jason Goroncy (Jason had nothing to do with post. I just found the article link at his blog. Please don’t blame him or ply him with questions about Madonna’s ordination or her credentials, academic or clergy.)

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