Take a Stand Ministries Creates Bible Belt

April 26, 2009


Using the latest in Bible Based Satellite (BS) technology and a bible based cloaking device secretly developed in the 1990s….Take A Stand Ministries (TSM) with over 26 years of absolute truth fighting has created a Bible Based Bible Belt. The Online Discernmentalist Mafia excited over this new bible based fashion statement quoted an unnamed spokesman from TSM “This bible based bible belt is a one size fits all bible belt made out of authentic King James Bibles seamlessly woven together. It’s all based on scripture.

The Online Discernmentalist Mafia was so IMPRESSED that we ordered  four, three for our tireless writers and one for our chief research monkey robot who is running much better now with his Windows XP service pack 2.0. He refuses to run on Vista…go figure.

“Who Wants to be a Discernmentalist” gets summer revival

April 25, 2009

“Who Wants trealo be a Discernmentalist” — the television quiz show about truth warriors that heralded a flood of reality programing on U.S. television like “Big Discernment Brother and Survivor: Truth Warrior Edition” — will return to prime time screens in late summer.

Original host from Slice of Laodicea will be back to host the show.

The show, which was created in America, and its popular line “Will you answer the question – are you a heretic?”  a smash hit. Rating began to plummet when contestants where unable to discern heresy as quick as audiences had originally hoped.

Obama To Deploy 4,000 Pentagon Discernmentalists In Afghanistan

April 25, 2009

obAccording to Reuters “The United States will deploy 4,000 extra Discernmentalists to train Afghan truth forces in a revamp of its Afghan strategy that aims to disrupt Emergents  and roll back the advances of the Emerging Church at large through meaningless arguments, fuzzy logic, guilt by association and misinformation, and squabbling over non-essentials.”

We expect sound bible teaching to spread throughout the middle east once Emergents are killed off.

We agree with Ingrid of Slice!

April 24, 2009

Miss Prejean known as 2009’s Miss California stood up against gay marriage.  And according to Ingrid we should not back her as she is wrong!

Ingrid of Slice takes apart what Miss Prejean really meant as she spoke…

“Well, I think it’s great that Americans are able to choose one or the other. (Really? That’s great? It’s actually disgusting and against God’s definition of marriage. She needs to repent from such comments. She should pray for wisdom as well) Um, we live in a land that you can choose same sex marriage or opposite marriage.(Being able to “choose” shows how far our country has slid from God’s enduring commands. She should have started the sentence with “Sadly, …” In not doing so, she is sending a mixed message) And, you know what? In my country, and in my family, I think (It doesn’t matter what she thinks, or what I think. What matters is what the Word of God says about the matter) that I believe (see previous comment) that a marriage should be between a man and a woman. No offense(Jesus was the Rock of offense, and Christian positions on topics such as gay marriage will be offensive as well. It’s an occupational hazard) to anybody out there, but that’s how I was raised and that’s how I think (again, doesn’t matter what she thinks) that it should be – between a man and a woman (Biblically, the only way it can be). Thank you.”

Let’s forget that a gay activist was asking this question in beauty contest that she was being judged for her poise and answered very well under the pressure off the cuff. I mean why would she even be in a godless beauty contest to begin with? Can you name one godly women who was part of a beauty contest?

So we agree with Ingrid… if someone takes a stand against gay marriage we should be outraged that they agree with us and be like the world and attack and tear down that person…we agree with Ingrid and back her in her attacking a person that agrees with our position.

Keep spreading the hate Ingrid… we feed off it…

I. Todyaso

ABOMINATION NATION This is a non- interactive blog!

April 24, 2009


Exciting non-interactive blog ABOMINATION NATION is a new and non-dynamic site exposing false teachers and readers (ie like YOU guys!) This non-interactive blog  (like other online discernmentalist ministers of the truth) does not allow for feedback, input or correction etc because we realize that TRUTHINESS is weak and should not be challenged.

TRUTHINESS cannot stand up to investigation, inquisitiveness, inquiries or questions. That is why these blogs allow no feedback. We (ODMafia) are in the midst of stopping (ie squashing feedback) but for some reason the control panel on our blog is malfunctioning allowing sinners, the unrighteous, anti-truthites etc to post things that are against truth., or worse  – statements that disagree with us. We demand rigid authoritarian control of all blogs!!!

Information should be PIPED one way – into your mind so that it alleviates you from any hard work – like thinking! Remember, let the ODMafia and others do the discerning for YOU!!!

New Pope Elected!

April 23, 2009

pope1We at the ODMafia are proud to announce the election of a new Discernmentalist POPE!

Who is this expert on abomination?

By what authority does he appoint himself Pope?

Just like the Roman Catholic pope “there is no reason for discussion or argument” says blogger ABOMINATION NATION !!!

Abomination Nation has come out slugging – exercising keen discernmentalism at its BEST such as overgeneralizations, presumption and cold hard “facts.”

Therefore, the Online Discernmentalist Mafia welcomes the Pope of Discernmentalism to the ODM flock.

Gather round fellow Cardinals and give your vicar Pope Abomination the respect due!

Take A Stand Ministries Re-Writes Rick Warren’s Prayer

April 23, 2009

rickwarren1Eric Barger’s Take a Stand Ministries, possessing more holiness and insightfulness than regular Christians took the liberty to re-write Rick Warren’s prayer as the way it should be. The super prayer (as referred to by Take A Stand Ministries) mentions “Jesus” 37 times, “absolute truth” 12 times, “Bible believing” 19 times,” Take A Stand Ministries stands for truth” 39 times, and “Rick Warren is not a bible believer who stands for truth like we do” 6 times.

We the Online Discernmentalist Mafia look forward to the TV scheduled broadcast as soon as it hits the air. Absolute truth is always refreshing.

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