Hidden Planet of Truth Discovered in Old Hubble Data

May 15, 2009

macA new technique has uncovered an extrasolar truth-planet hidden in Hubble Space Telescope images taken 11 years ago

The new strategy may allow discernmentalist researchers to uncover other distant alien worlds potentially lurking in over a decade’s worth of Hubble archival data.

The planet is estimated to be at least seven times the mass of Jupiter and exuding a new and strange phenomenon – truth rays. It is the outermost of three massive planets known to orbit the dusty young star TW 8799 (TW – truth warrior), which is 130 light-years away from Earth.

A John MacArthur Orthodox Satellite will be sent to this mysterious planet for further investigation.  If it fails to measure up to MacArthur’s books it may be destroyed or an attempt to yank it out of orbit and fling it into the sun.

How can I quit Online Discernmentalist Ministry’s (ODM) without gaining weight?

May 15, 2009

overweightFirst, there is the simple fact that the truthiness  and ODMs slows down your metabolism. This effect lasts for about 30 minutes after each article. On giving up the truth-warrrior-discernment articles, you can burn more than 150-300 calories per day. But that depends on how many truth articles you imbibe and your individual metabolism.

Second, ODMs also has the effect of suppressing your appetite; probably by blocking the chemicals in your brain allowing you to think rationally. By reducing your ODM intake one can move into the realm of rational thinking – but its not easy.

The ODMafia advocates reading more TRUTH articles (mostly ours) and staying away from anyone who dares criticize ODMs (especially us). Gain weight if need be – but to be sure you NEED our articles to stay fresh, cutting edge and on top of false teaching. Therefore, if you are going on an ODM diet we recommend ODMafia once a day (for health reasons of course) while weening yourself off other  ODMs.

Remember, let us do your thinking for your!

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