U.S. billionaire roars into space history, may rule world

June 7, 2009

Astro

 Unknown by most Online Discernmentalists (but NOT by our trusty research staff), Brian McLaren ( a secret billionaire) roared into space aboard a Russian rocket (Communist???We think so) on Thursday, making history as the first tourist to make the epic journey. The Communist left-leaning Soyuz TMA-14 spacecraft blasted into the leaden skies from the Baikonur cosmodrome in Kazakhstan on schedule at 1149 GMT and is due to dock with the International Space Station (ISS) two days later. McLaren made an announcement to the world that he would now rule the Emergent World from the International Space Station.

The ODMafia has developed a partnership with Eric Barger’s Take a Stand Ministries and has BORROWED his Bible Based Satellite System better know as B.S. We plan to shoot down Mclaren’s rogue attempt at ruling the world and the Emergent Church. We need our readers to send money in support of our bible based initiative to rid the world of the Emergent Church by using lasars specially focused on the International Space Station (ISS). At this point in time the curent lasars are only powerful enough to make a really cool hologram….we need one that is destructive and can blow up the ISS. Please send us cash….we only accept bills in sizes of $100 or larger. If YOU are BIBLE BASED you know in your heart that you must send us this money…..otherwise you may be guilty of being a lover of money and mammon.

We urgently resquest that our readers send cash so that we can rid the world of Brian McLaren before he rules it – DON”T LET THIS HAPPEN!

P.S. The ODMafia regrets the fact that we may in fact have to destroy the 60 billion dollar space station but believes that this will be for the betterment of humanity and all discernmentalism. We hope that this will not deter NASA’s current program to get back to the moon and then onto Mars. We hope that no other astronauts are hurt, harmed or maimed in our endeavour to rid the world of the Emergent Menace.


William Lane Craig not up to par

June 7, 2009

JeansWilliam Lane Craig, renowned apologist found to be sub-par and unable to truly deal with apologetic subjects because he was photographed wearing jeans and had discarded his tie - so says the elite ODMs and their affiliates the ODM Religious Police.

He has authored or edited over thirty books including the ABCs of Super Thinking, and You are Not As Smart As Me (An expose of the logical inconsistencies of the online discernmentalist crowd) and My High IQ is Your Problem Not Mine. ODMS are still furious and attempting to discernmentalize many of his books.

A very popular site describing itself as a news service (mostly of all the worst of Christendom), yet oddly enough delivering commentary on bad news but suggesting it is NOT an ODM was rumoured to have said “It is sad these days to see such horrific examples such as Christians wearing jeans….not like the good old days like the 1940s and 50s when purity reigned America…”


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