The newest line of Bible products that has help me save face at MY church is the Bible Duster. The other day I noticed my Bible had gathered a little dust. Now like most of our readers, I KNOW the Bible so studying it seems a little overboard. Yet, the other day as I was reading it and trying to not let it get too deep into me. (God forbid we meditate and contemplate the Bible! That could lead to becoming a heretic like those emerging folk!) This product will help you keep up the appearance that you never forget to read your Bible. (Again please only filter your reading through THIS site and other APPROVED sites we recommend!) Simply take the Bible Duster© and run it over your dusty Bible and viola! No more embarrassing dust! This is handy for those who need that little extra help in their Bible studies.
Now I personally have many Bibles such as the one I read (pictured above).
I have my show Bible that looks well worn for church. It is only opened at church. It opens only to specific passages the Truth War Church will approve.
I also have my travel Bible or the one I take on my air travels across the world teaching my great wisdom and knowledge of OUR Doctrines. My Huge Bible makes sure all know I am a REAL Christian and not some phony one! It is also handy in helping me make sure I have an empty seat next to me on the plane!
We here at the ODMafia know how important keeping up appearances is! So please buy the Bible Duster© and make sure that those real Discernmentalist Church members will not take special notice of you!