How ODM’s stay awake at night.

asleep-at-computer

Are you falling asleep while doing research on those heretics? Researching heresy can be very tiring and parsing through quotes can make your eyes want to fall out. Here are some helpful tips in how to stay awake while doing your research.

1. Slap yourself.

2. Make things up.

3. Just post links to another overworked ODM.

4. Write another post on how you are being persecuted by those who want to hold you accountable for the things you say about others.

5. Tell people there is a hideous threat and you may have to delete your entire blog.

6. Delete all old posts and claim the web service you are using deleted it. Beg for finacial support to offset loss.

7. Post videos of you street preaching. Be sure they contain profanity from those you preached and at least one time you called someone a whore or slut.

8. Take a walk to the local bar or pub and ask if anyone is an Emergent. Then pour their Guinness in their lap. 

9. Listen to a Walter Martin tape and twist a quote to be against the emerging church.

10. Look for sites that refute what you state and mock them and make up lies against that person stating they claimed to not be a real Christian.

11. Here is a bonus one: Develop a straw man argument that is proven by a majorly huge overgeneralization.

These all help me in those late night research vigils. I hope they help you also as you add your valuable research to the Truth War. These are just some of the tools that help we who Truth Warriors gain the high ground so we can shove our heals into the face of those who stand against OUR DOCTRINES.

I. Todyaso

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One Response to How ODM’s stay awake at night.

  1. truthslayer says:

    I wish you had written this years ago, I would have slapped myself silly.

    As for making stuff up, why does a discernmentalist need to be told that…shouldn’t that come naturally? I digress….once again another brilliant discernmentalist dissertation!

    Like

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