Wear a tin foil hat for protection!

Are you afraid that liberals, emergents, moderate conservatives (ie secret covert liberals), are taking over the church that seeks to undermine the absolute truth?

Are you afraid that new ideas my infiltrate your mind and steer your away from Christo-fascism, consumerism or make you eager to be a minister of reconciliation, a peace-monger or care for the poor?

Are you afraid that  you may consider practicing the Roman Catholic like Lectio Divina?

Are you afraid of THE SHACK?

Are you afraid to contemplate Bible Verses because that is TOO close to contemplative spirituality?

We offer the TIN FOIL hat for protection. It is a limited time offer and you can get it now for $19.99. Order now and get a free set of steak knives normally priced at $199.99 but yours free with this offer.

Dial 1-800-FEAR-NOW

**A Truthslayer Guarantee**


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7 Responses to Wear a tin foil hat for protection!

  1. [...] At the blog, The Online Discernmentalist Mafia, a new gadget offers protection from Liberal, Emergent, Catholic-related, Shack-inspired influences that might creep into your mind undetected. [...]

  2. David Fisher says:

    Thanks for the warning. I found myself meditating on a passage of scripture and was told that I had lost my salvation.

  3. truthslayer says:

    Thank-goodness that we were here to prevent you from some liberal-emergent-NT Wright practice of bible meditation! Remember, read scripture, but never deeply think on it….you are liable to act on such things and who knows where that could lead!!!

  4. [...] by liberals who are taking over the world using hypnotherapy broadcast through the scented candles. Tinfoil hats will be distributed to true believers by next [...]

  5. Jeremy says:

    I have a problem with your use of the term, “tinfoil hat”.

    Everyone knows that only a steel V2K cap will block mind control energy weapons.

  6. [...] it’s glory. Forget the Purpose-Driven heretical drivel of Rick Warren—we support the Conspiracy-Driven Church. Remember Truth is under attack by our enemies—-some of whom have even crept up into our [...]

  7. […] Einsteiger-Paranoide ändern daher zumindest die Zahlen, die Teile dieser generierten Passwörter sind. Fortgeschrittene Paranoide verwenden solche Generatoren überhaupt nicht. Meister-Paranoide benutzen überhaupt keine Passwörter, denn die müsste man sich merken, und Gedanken könnten schließlich abgehört werden … daher die Alufolie auf dem Torfkopf. […]

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