Jerks for Jesus

December 16, 2009

The well known ministry JERKS FOR JESUS, a clearing-house for discernmentalist super ideas, insight by osmosis, and presumption celebrates a new look! Jerks for Jesus spokesman, A.R.Rogant notes “We all know that when you are in a truth war, haughtiness, self-righteousness and hate are perfect default positions when we are under attack! We cannot have people deeply abiding in the spirit with prayerful contemplation, lectio divina. or loving one another. What will become of Christians who spend TOO much time going over the same verses? We have to treat our enemies like crap so that they can see the truth.”

He further comments “We make no apologies for supporting US foreign policy, torture, invasions and assassinations. It’ the Christian way! We’re not like Islam or their terrorists.We’re civilized. In fact we think that we must come down harder – in the name of our PURE DOCTRINES. Moreover, we need this clearinghouse of ideas to decide who is apostate (ie Rob Bell), who will go to hell (ie certainly Rick Warren), and who needs a good lashing (and we mean this figuratively and literally ) Torture is good in the right hands! Who else is going to do this with the same integrity? We need more enemies to prove our self-righteousness!!!”

Without Jerks for Jesus, there would be no way for us discernmentalists to share our expert opinions and spinning quotes out of context. We have a whole team of experts who scour the net for disquieting quotes and insure at every possible angle that they are read in the worst light possible. That is what true ministry is all about, spot the sheep, turn him into a wolf and then “discernmentalize him.” It takes just a few good articles to do this sort of thing. We are very thankful that we are so blessed with this undertaking.

Finally remember these immortal words  “Blessed not are those who mourn, for they shall not be comforted. Comfort and feeling good about ourselves is from the devil, sissies, weak pansies and liberals.Blessed are the proud and arrogant, for they shall conquer and triumph over all of the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for legalism, for they shall satisfy God’s wrath.”

At ODMafia, let us do the thinking for you! Remember,they know WE are true Christians by our PURE doctrines!

Truthslayer


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