We discernmentalists know that anyone seeking unity is out to destroy the true biblical church. That is why we have invented the “Unity in Hate Machine,” yours for only $19.99….and if you order now you will get a pair of steak knives for free….and that’s not all we will throw in a towel absolutely free if you order now! Now!
The “Unity in Hate Machine,” detects anyone Bible studying with a non-approved Christian such as a Roman Catholics, Arminians or Democrats …and sounds a distinctive alarm when detecting culprits. It is a high pitched alarm that cannot be heard by these particular denominations and a black spray is applied to culprit. Religious police are quickly dispatched and apostates whisked off to be interrogated about their theology. Remember, anyone promoting unity is suspect and probably a closet ecumenical.
Order now while supplies last!