Washington (Reuters) – Online Discernmentalist Ministries have trimmed its goals for cutting hot-air gases (spewing from overzealous rhetoric) and made clear it will follow the U.S. lead on fighting climate change, a move that prompted fresh criticism from green groups.
Bob Nestor of GREEN AMERICA stated “Too many discernmentalists continue to spew hot air and they do not give any thought to the environment.” Greenpeace spokesman weighed in suggesting “Discernmentalists are the number one cause of planet warming. Methane from cows is no contest next to these hot air spouters.”
ODMs across North America and South Africa claimed personal attacks and decided that they would take a stand, fighting back with more hot air and long winded articles. One ODM denounced the pronouncements and suggested that they were being intentionally undermined by liberals who are taking over the world using hypnotherapy generated through scented candles. Tinfoil hats will be distributed to true believers by next Wed.