Mobile Discernmentalists Unit

Recently the Department of Motorized Discernmentalism created a new Highway Discernmentalist Patrol Unit aka the Mobile Discernmentalism Unit or MobDU for short.

MobDU‘s primary tasks are:

  • Discernmentalizing Eco-friendly vehicles
  • Tagging and registering non-gas guzzling vehicles
  • Making sure all vehicles on the road pollute the environment in order to speed up Jesus’ hasty yet sure return, the End Times and the Rapture
  • Checking  to see if all cars have at least one unregenerate reprobated non-Elect heathen on board just in case the Rapture happens soon as those Left Behind will need to man the car
  • Scouting out Emergent Vehicles
  • Alerting Discernmentalists whenever  Brian McLaren’s Monster Truck and Dan Kimball’s Spider Vehicle of Doom are nearby

Among other Discernmentalizing tasks—also meet our new Armored MobDU Patrol Unit for extra protection against Doctrinal Impurities, the Emerging Apostasy, Emergentness and other such Heresies:

About these ads

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

%d bloggers like this: