Discernmentlist Apprentice!

October 11, 2019

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Introducing the newest show on Discernmentalist networks: Discenmentalist Apprentice starring our Most Biblical and Godly President ever Donald J. Trump as he preaches the Gospel of the Total Depravity of everyone but himself and discernmentalists. All while searching for America’s Next Top Discernmentalists. Who better for the role than the only man to pass the Way of the Master’s Are You A Good Person? test with flying colors (other than Jesus): “I like to be good. I don’t like to have to ask for forgiveness. And I am good. I don’t do a lot of things that are bad. I try to do nothing that is bad.”—our Messiah President Donald J. Trump.

Tyrone Hoofendorfer would be proud as—just like President Donald J. Trump—Hoofendorfer’s Law of Discernmentalism states:

Paul Haggis says his reason for leaving the church is their support of Prop. 8. That would be one of the very few reasons I support this church. Homosexuals and homosexuality need to go back in the closet. They should NOT be proud of themselves. Homosexuality is a reprehensible sin. A lot of you will complain and call me names. I don’t care. I KNOW that YOU are the sinners, NOT ME!!!”

In fact we know that President Donald J. Trump is among us sinless Elect!

 


Unnamed Discernmentalist pregnant with Thought

October 11, 2019

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LOS ANGELES (Reuters) – There is talk that an unnamed Supermodel, TV presenter and Discernmentalist  is pregnant with thought.

Seal confirmed the rumors from the stage of a concert on Thursday in New York’s Radio City Hall, telling the audience; “the unnamed discernmentalist is full of recycled ideas and more outrage than 2008!…we expect more anger, more resentment and more bitterness than ever before”

We are hoping for more “Are you a good person?” converts to meet our epithet quotas. We expect the unnamed discernmentalist to explode with epithets in the last quarter of 2019!

 

Signed an unnamed Discernmentalist


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