April 4, 2011
Ladies, Gentleman, and Underlings, we knew that the fallout from the Rob Bell heretical view of non-hell was going to undermine the truth of scripture and lead many astray (sorry for the lack of grammatical clarity but we are so upset over this news we can’t use punctuation properly) but never did we imagine the magnitude of the fallout. Nor did we imagine the swiftness in which the Devil was going to lead people astray. Nor did we think that our leadership would fall.
What’s the big news?
Hold on to your phylacteries, bathe in holy water, hide the eyes of the innocent, and prepare the millstones: R.C. Sproul (a.k.a second in charge [behind John McArthur PBUH] of calvinist
dogma doctrine) says GOD IS IN HELL! I wish we could say that we are making this up, we wish that we could say that there was some confusion of intent, we wish that we could say wait until the book comes out but we can’t. The truth is that R.C. Sproul believes firmly that GOD IS IN HELL based on this excerpt from his upcoming book “The place of God’s Disfavor”.
The problem with hell is not simply the absence of God’s graciousness. It is the presence of God that is so difficult. God is present in hell because He is omnipresent. The psalmist declares, “Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? If I ascend into heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there” (Ps. 139:7-8). If God is everywhere in His being, then certainly He is in hell as much as He is anywhere else. The problem, then, is what He is doing there. He’s there in His judgment. He is there in His punitive wrath. He is present in hell as the One who executes His justice on those who are there. That’s why I say that anyone who is in hell would most want God, more than anyone else, to leave.
Rob Bell says there is no Hell. R.C. Sproul says God is in Hell. What next? God is Dead? Only God knows…well…and us. After all we are discermentalists!
November 11, 2010
With the all new MIND CONTROL SPRAY (researched by ODMAFIA) – you simply apply the spray to any clear thinking person rejects your illogical lines of random and ill conceived thoughts. Whomever is sprayed will begin to succumb to such as phrases as “bible believing,” “absolute biblical truth,” and “bible based, ” as a form of self-affirming circular logic. Because we say its true…it is true Using these phrases coupled with almost any idea imaginable will enable someone under control of the MIND CONTROL SPRAY to appreciate any insight you have as “bible believing” etc. In addition, if you suffer from any latent paranoia regarding the potential for false teaching this will aid in bringing your fears to an entirely new level. With MIND CONTROL SPRAY you will quickly begin referring everyone who does not measure up to your perfect doctrine as unAmerican, unbiblical, liberal, left-wing, emergent, catholic, anglican, liberal-biased, heretic, communist, democrat, socialist, marxist, peaceniks and anti-semite.
Bible based slander is needed in these troubling times….be sure to order yours today!
PS Use two squirts of Mind Control to reduce any peace loving, anti-war sentiment.
May 31, 2010
I just read the following and would like some follow up…”One thing I’ve learned is that once the HH’s determine a target(Here, they will spin ANY piece of information they get into a negative crusade against that target. They feel that the ends (proving they are right) justify the means (even if that includes lying). They don’t seem to remember that the Bible clearly states that liars will burn in hell.”
Is this true?
John we are appalled that you would doubt us. Any shred of evidence (no matter how minor or irreverent) is used to indict victims those who are opposed to absolute truth. We also believe that taking words and sentences out of context to show how bad, depraved our theological enemy is – is an approved method of discernment and apologetics. Remember, when we “spin” is for the sake of truth….and if it means lying for truth we are technically telling the truth….because we would never lie.