The Sickness in Discernmentalist Ministries

August 17, 2019

D4j7hMhW0AAWruJBecome  a part of the Deformed and Discernmentalist Southern Baptist unTwitterati Cabal today by mocking those who have fallen gravely ill. We are now accepting applicants. If you feel the current evangelical leadership (JD Greear, Russell Moore, Al Molher, Beth Moore, Tim Keller, etc.) are becoming evil libruls because they’re starting to acknowledge the existence of racial disparities in the criminal justice system—you’ll fit right in with us.

Just like Pastor Gabe we Discernmentalists believe sickness is a symptom of lifelong sin. We also believe we should be discernmentalizing 24/7—finding a new heretic of the week:

As a former news-junkie, I’ve often lamented the advent of 24/7 news. It has done more harm to journalism than any school of journalism (with all of their agendas) could have ever accomplished. Today, 24/7 news has created a feeding frenzy around every speculation, hearsay, possible motive, or misspoken word. The men and women formerly called journalists have an audience waiting to hear something new, and the industry demands that our network get it out before your network. So, rather than well-researched facts, so-called journalists are spitting out every kind of agenda-based opinion, to the point that fake news has become “a thing.” Have you notice how many “breaking news alerts” you hear on the 24/7 news channels? Events that have been scheduled for weeks are “breaking news.” Why the hyperbole? It is because of the feeding frenzy.

Discernment ministry has grown to this level as well. Those who have built their ministry around this work now have a constituency that they must feed. There is an expectation that the so-called discerners bring forth a new heretic of the week. After all, we already know about the other heretics, we’ve left their teaching, we are bored with them, and we’ve already posted the warnings on social media. But this is a new day, and discernment ministries have an empty blog and a silent podcast to fill.

The world is full of liberal sickos and they’re all out to get us. We’d like to thank Pastor Gabe for helping us spread the Discernmentalist Gospel.


Are The Council on Biblical Manhood and womanhood Evanjellyfish?

May 14, 2019

cbmw

Beardless weirdos

The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood (CBMW) exposed as weak gutless grace wimpy girliemen as per our Clear Teachings that all Truly Biblical manly-men have beards. In fact we’re beginning to question the Spine of their doctrines as they claim to teach gender distinction but are all clean shaven men. Where does such thinking come from? Where is the consistency when it is taught women have to dress like women and know their place but men can claim “christian liberty” when it comes to shaving off the God given mark of masculinity.

Only spineless Evanjellyfish would shave their beards off—now we all know Spurgeon the Prince of Preachers had a beard that’s why his Doctrines were so Pure as did Calvin. Luther once had a beard but had a lapse of judgment and shaved it off—if only he had followed Calvin’s example when he started the Protestant Reformation when Calvin was only 8 years old. We believe that’s why he erred in attacking our Truth that Calvin’s teachings are the most important teachings in all of Church History as any True Reformer would like John MacArthur (PBUH)*:

 It is recorded that Luther later said that Calvin was “educated, but strongly suspected of the error of the Sacramentarians.”[1] That is, that Calvin did not believe the same things regarding the Lord’s Supper as the Lutheran Reformers.

In this it appears that in Luther’s grand biography Calvin does not receive a great deal of mention. For Luther, Calvin would appear perhaps as a footnote.

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*- John MacArthur (PBUH) author of The Truth War

How can the CBMW expect to stop the GLBT hordes if they refuse to follow the Bible’s Clear Teachings that all True and Godly manly-men have beards?

In our current culture, the progressive trends of gender confusion and transgenderism is all the more reason we should uphold the biblical picture of a masculine man by having beards to stand separated from the pagan culture of today.

Thankfully you have True Bible-based ministries like ours with the Spines and beards to prove it to help protect you in the Purity of our facial hair—and the Sound Doctrines of the Ways of the Master himself which teach Absolute Biblical Truth in his book The Truth War: Fighting for Certainty in an Age of Deception from the spineless beardless GLBT Evanjellyfish agenda slipping into our churches.

 


Judging Books by the Authors on their Covers

May 4, 2019

cool-judge-book-cover-math-enjoy

Since Eternity Matters we bring you this important lesson in Discernmentalism: ‘With the late RHE as the author you can judge a book by the cover…(for she) was a false teacher who lead countless people astray and affirmed them in their sin and rebellion. And she aggressively supported pro-abortion policies.’ (Link)

We here at the ODMafia agree as our Research Robot Monkeys have also discermentalized the following important facts to fit the narrative of this essential truth of this teaching on judgmentalism:

  1. Saint Augustine was the author of “The City of God” and was a false teacher because he was a Mary-worshipping popish-pagan semi-Pelagian Romanist Catholic who lead countless people astray and affirmed them in their sin and rebellion. And he aggressively supported pro-war policies (against non-Catholics).
  2. Martin Luther was the author of “The Jews and Their Lies” so therefore was a false teacher who followed Augustinianism and lead countless people astray and affirmed them in their sin and rebellion. And he aggressively supported anti-Semitic as well as anti-Capitalist policies.
  3. John Calvin was the author of “The Institutes of Christian Religion” and was a false teacher who lead countless people astray and affirmed them in their sin and rebellion by following Luther’s Protestant doctrines of protesting God’s ordained authority (the Pope). And he aggressively supported pro-overregulation by spying on others as well as pro-murder policies by executing heretics.
  4. Charles Spurgeon was the author of “Morning & Evening” and was a follower of Calvin but also a “Reformed” Baptist and was a false teacher who lead countless people astray and affirmed them in their sin and rebellion by rejecting Calvin’s Clear Teachings on Baptism. And he aggressively supported anti-imperialist and anti-war policies.
  5. G. K. Chesterton was the author of “Orthodoxy” who was a false teacher for being an apostate Catholic philosopher who lead countless people astray and affirmed them in their sin and rebellion. And he aggressively supported pro-wealth redistribution policies.
  6. C. S. Lewis was the author of “Mere Christianity” as well as Children’s fantasy novels so was a false teacher who lead countless people astray and affirmed them in their sin and rebellion by teaching universalism. And he aggressively supported pro-egalitarian policies.
  7. Doug Wilson is the author of “Evangellyfish” and is a false teacher who leads countless people astray and affirms them in their sin and rebellion by teaching semi-Arian heresy. And he aggressively supports pro-racist neo-Confederate and pro-rape policies.
  8. James White is the author of “The Potter’s Freedom” and also is a false teacher by teaching that social issues have nothing to do with the Gospel (despite the witness of church history) who leads countless people astray and affirms them in their sin and rebellion. And he aggressively supports the never Trump movement and anti-social justice policies.

This list could go on for an eternity but because Eternity Matters we have more important things to do like teaching the Good News of our Angry God who hates everybody not like us or don’t believe in the Purity of our great Doctrines.

A recent post of ours by Dr. I. Todyaso slightly related to this one: New Emerging Heretic Bible Found.


“Reformation Eroding!”: Warns Pulpit & Pen

April 24, 2019

idolatry

Once again the Pure Doctrines of our most Holy most illustrious most inerrant Pope of our Truth War (PBUH) have come under attack. Our Research Robot Monkeys have noted that one of our own Al Mohler (who we already exposed as a Socialist against our Clear Teachings) did something that we ODMs disapprove of: mourned the fire at Notre Dame against our Clear Teachings against such. Quote:

Like most in the Evangelical Intelligentsia, Albert Mohler is signaling a virtue that is almost altogether disconnected from his theology. The long, long line to mourn the loss of a Temple of Idols forms somewhere near the headquarters of The Social Gospel Coalition, who lean heavily upon Roman Catholic Liberation Theology to support their progressive political agenda.

Mohler wrote an article entitled History Burning Before Our Eyes in which he laments the loss of so much ‘history.’ The history of Roman Catholicism has been the death of hundreds of thousands of Protestants, abject tyranny, responsibility for the Dark Ages, and the propagation of superstitious anti-Christ religion around the world.

We here at the ODMafia agree that this is a clear perversion of our the Doctrines of Grace and will erode the Protestant Reformation of Martin Luther’s (who observed Easter against our clear teachings on it’s pagan catholic origins) and John Calvin (who was influenced by the Patristics against our clear teachings to avoid all things Catholic). For shame Al—repent back to our Angry ODM Truth War Gospel against all those we deem unworthy of God’s grace or the liberals; gays; emergent hordes; Catholics; semi-pelagians; Rob Bell;  Armenians; pacifists; extraterrestrials; Red Letter Christians; Dracula; Bigfoot; etc. whose God’s love wins will erode our Reformation and the Purity of our Sound Doctrines and prevent us from bringing all of us back to the Dark Ages.

As noted by one of our fellow Discernmentalists after reading the excellent Discernmentalist article by Bullsh@t & Spin Dullspit & Sin Dips#it & Pretend Pulpit & Pen:

“Quite a shame Al Mohler bases his postmodern opinion on to the Reformers none of whom were Catholic. There was not even a shred of mention by them being influenced by Catholic belief. I’m sick of Social Justice promoting Christians? basing all their thoughts on things with “feelings.” I don’t care how you feel about things, you don’t get to change the facts to suit your preferences, just by posting your favorite leftist postmodern opinion. Truth be told the Reformers are rolling over in their graves with everything you jackasses have done to screw up the church.”—Tyrone V. Hoofendorfer

We move that Phil Johnson aka Hugh Jass  of the mighty Truth Warrior site Pyromaniacs force persuade Al to rejoin the ODM fold and take a stand in the Pure Doctrines of our most illustrious most Holy most inerrant Pope over ODMs and internet Calvinists everywhere (PBUH) or revoke his association with Mohler. In case you have forgotten my credentials—I was personally  mentored by the late great Pastor-Teacher to the Online Congregation of the True Remnant of ODMs—who personally sat at the feet of the late Walter Martin by pouring over his Apologetics cassette tapes for several hours. This gives me more than enough self-righteousness to discernmentalize and judgmentalize all those who don’t hold true to the Purity of our Doctrines of the Truth War.


Most Heretical Places On Earth

December 16, 2010

TOP NEWSPIN– In a recent polling undertaken by Top Discernmentalists, discernmentalists from around the globe have voted on the Most Heretical Places On Earth. In a surprise ruling Canada and California dropped to the 4th and 5th position (respectively) in the poll. Here is the official listing of the Top 5 Most Heretical Places On Earth:

  1. Armenia: full of man-loving Grace-hating semi-Pelagian Mary-worshiping Papal idolatry celebrating Roman Arminianists; a road straight to Rome; none who live here have any hope of salvation; all are unsaved non-Elect reprobates
  2. Montana: the Montanist state nough said! The heretic named Iggy lives here.
  3. Germany: birthplace of Lutheranism; untouched by the Protestant Reformation; spiritually dead*
  4. Canada: or Canuckistan is a communist country; full of drug addicts, pacifists and queers; produces sin-promoting television shows
  5. California: too liberal; clone of Canada; full of fornicators; other reasons 

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*- Further Reading: Truly Reformed; Lutherans not Truly Reformed; Dortian Calvinism Truly Reformed


Brannon Howse joins with Jim Wallis in fight against Glen Beck

August 27, 2010

Brannon Howse joins with Jim Wallis in fight against Glen Beck.

 

It seems that we have lost two great truth warriors who have decided to fight with Jim Wallis against Glenn Beck. Both Ken Silva and Brannon Howse have joined forces with Jim Wallis thus shaking the ODM world with a mighty blast of horrifying blasphemy! More to come later.


Fox News’ Secret Liberal Agenda

August 10, 2010

Our faithful Research Robot Monkeys are ever scouring the world in our quest of rooting out the True Christians from the fakers and pretenders; the True Converts from the False Converts. This was why we were so shocked when thanks to our Research Robot Monkey Infiltrators we discovered that Fox News are so ungodly. Not only is Fox News ungodly, they are also full of fake and pretend Christians aka False Converts because they pretend to be bible-believing Conservatives while all the while secretly supporting  the ungodly liberal agenda. Here for all the world our Research Robot Monkeys expose Fox News’ Hidden Liberal Agenda:

  • they are way too ecumenical
  • ecumenism = liberalism
  • ecumenism = one world religion/one world government/new world order
  • they mix True Bible-Believing Conservative Christian Believers with False Converts such as Mary and Pope-worshipping Romanists and non-Christians (Mormons) against the clear Bible teaching  of the Doctrine of Separatism in 2 Corinthians 6:14-18
  • by being ecumenical they plan to unleash an unholy hybrid of Calvinism (Absolute Biblical Truth) with Papism and Mormonism upon the world
  • they are crybabies
  • crying = effeminate
  • effeminate = queerosexual
  • queerosexual = liberal
  • liberal  = terrorist

But most importantly they broke the 11th Commandment—one of the holiest of  all commandments which is: “Thou shall not cry with an unbeliever; it is an abomination.”
(Holy Ways Of The Master King James John MacArthur Bible: Wretched Edition).


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