Breaking: Emergents now attacking Truth Warriors with Psychic Powers!

July 24, 2019

epsych

Oh the horror! Recently one of our Research Robot Monkeys noted that Emergents are now hiring psychics in a last ditch effort to undermine the Absolute Truth and Certainty of the Truth Wars. We here at the ODMafia can’t say we didn’t see this coming from a mile away as we know Emerging emergers love their mystical webs of confusion. Emergents also love Mystery over Certainty as well as coffee; candles and couches—but they’ve yet to be observed in the presence of garlic. We also have reason to suspect that these Emerging vampires have merged with Mothra feminists in order to ramp up their newly found psychic abilities in order to assault unsuspecting Truth Warriors in the field of battle for our Truth. Other noted ODMs are now in the midst of battling for our Truth—researchmentalizing new techniques in Spiritual Warfare to curb these assaults.


Beating a Dead Horse: a Discernmentalist’s Favorite Pastime!

June 5, 2019

BiodegradableLegitimateAtlanticsharpnosepuffer-small

Dear ODMafia,

Why do you discuss the same topics over and over again.

Signed,

Slightly Annoyed

Dear Slightly Annoyed,

In case you are new to the world of Discernmentalism—we have to warn you of the same threats over and over again as this is the Truth War and beating a dead horse is our favorite pastime. Now we all  know that Postmodernism has already died and that we are in the Post-Postmodern Age now but as Discernmentalists we constantly live in the past. We must ever be slapping the church by beating dead horses as there are many Trojan Horses slipping through our gates.

And we do love beating our dead horses into people over and over and over again and again and again see:

  1. Here: When Christians call on unbelievers to conform to a certain “religious standard” without faith and repentance in Jesus Christ, we run the risk of leading them to believe that becoming a Christian means simply living a good life. No matter how many pieces of legislation become law and no matter the number of laws to which the unsaved conform, they are still lost in sin [so] when the church takes on the role of morality police…we are only addressing the symptoms of their unsaved condition. How can the unregenerate be anything less than they are? Their worldviews are the foundation of their values, and their values are the foundation of their conduct. Until their unbiblical worldviews are transformed into a biblical view through faith and repentance in Jesus Christ, they are slaves to sin.[Tragically], moralism is just as dangerous and deadly as outright liberalism. As John MacArthur has said, “It makes no difference if an unsaved person is for or against abortion, [is] a political liberal or a conservative, a prostitute or a police officer; he will spend eternity apart from God unless he repents and believes the gospel.”—Excerpts from Religious Trojan Horse by Brannon Howse.
  2. And here: As a long-time observer and critic of the EC, informed people are deeply grieved because those in the emerging movement—as with classic liberalism—are moving beyond mere syncretistic pluralism and embracing universalism; and furthermore, under the circus big tent this counterfeit version of the Christian faith has grown into a neo-liberal cult, complete with it’s denial of cardinal doctirnes of the Christian faith, it’s own leaders, and it’s own postmodern progressive/liberal theology. I’ll warn you again, you embrace these false prophets at your own peril.— CROOKED TALK FROM THE EMERGING CHURCH TROJAN HORSE
  3. Here again again: YWAM a religious trojan horse
  4. And again here again: The “Trojan horse” that has been accepted within every part of the church is a deception called contemplative prayer. Some call it meditation, soaking, or centering prayer. It is veiled in Christian lingo and justified by Scripture (used out of context or without correct definitions of words), but is full of occult techniques from eastern religions and witchcraft. The teachers of this perverted form of prayer encourage things like repeating words or phrases over and over for long periods of time in meditative prayer, visualizing images of Jesus, the Father, God’s throne, healings or light within themselves and many other occult practices. It can also be done by focusing on the rhythm of one’s breathing or an object like an icon or the flame of a candle. The goal is to quiet the mind through a passive eastern-style meditation as a way to connect with the “divine presence” and generate mystical/prophetic experiences like “visiting the third heaven” at will. Sadly, the primary perpetrators of spreading these demonic doctrines are many well-known and respected Evangelical, Charismatic, and Catholic ministers. Many of them are also operating in spirits of divination while claiming their abilities are from the Holy Spirit. Some of them are as sincere as the fireman who ran through the fire to rescue the baby, but they are terribly deceived. Others know exactly what they are doing because they are agents of Satan who are purposely trying to undermine and destroy good churches and true Christians. But regardless of the motives, these occult practices are opening people up to dangerous spirits and beliefs.

Personally we still believe the axis of liberal Emerging/Emergent socialist justice-seeking Purpose-driven seeker-sensitive semi-Pelagian Canadian un-American gay Roman Catholic feminist Muslim Arminian universalist democrat commie pansies who believe God is love and that His love wins are this Trojan Horse responsible for all that is evil in the world and the church (but never our side).

Signed,

Don Jobson

P.S. Have you tried our mothballs yet? The smell of them should help cure your annoyance until you get use to Our Brand.


Boogie-Foot! Lives: A Cousin Of Bigfoot?

May 9, 2019

b782TruthScooper Times Reports— Recently discovered by Discernmentalists a new breed of the hideously heretically apostate Emerging hybrids—-a Semi-Pelagianese that was once thought to be extinct: Boogie-Foot. This four-eyed Romish unnatural perversion of God’s Holy Creation is said to be a close cousin of Bigfoot and is just one more of the ways in which the evil Emergent Babylonian hordes of Brian “Darn your soul to heck” McLaren’s apostate army stoops in order to eradicate Absolute Biblical Truth (as defined by our Truth War Pope). This hideous hybrid of Monocles and Synergy hypnotizes it’s victims with Contemplative chanting and the unholy flames of candlelight reminding all of it’s hellish origins and doctrines of demons. It chains it’s victims with the burden of Free Grace and a Freed Will towards charitable works. Rumors say it gravitates towards couches and dark roast coffee and other sinisterly Socialistic past times like soccer not to mention Sacher Tortes.

We were granted permission to help ODM Researchmentalists interview a survivor of a Boogie-Foot abduction who spun this mighty fine yarn:

Then they approached me, and I pissed my pants, literally. I am not ashamed to say this, I was so fearful I had no idea if this was it you know? That’s when I saw their heads. Their necks were hairless and they reminded me of vultures. Their heads had red hair, but also black feathers or I don’t know what it was, but it looked like feathers to me. Their eyes were dark, very dark and big as they got close to me.

His hair was long and about the same texture as mine as I recall. The hair on all of them was about the same shade of brown, like the color of the decomposed wood layer in the forest. I could see skin around his eyes that was tanned looking and where there was facial hair it was more sparse with glimpses of skin showing through that area as well. I couldn’t make out a neck.  His chin was broad, his teeth were about the size of the nail on my middle finger but they were more flat and he had a mouthful of them meaning the width of his “bite” was wide.  His mouth was wide enough to show most of them.  His eyes were dark with some white around them, less so than human eyes.  They were kind with crows feet at the outer edge of them.  His skin was weathered like anyone who spent much time outside, like a farmer.  His shoulders were very broad though I did see his collar bone on one side which looked thick compared to a humans.  He was muscular and heavily built but in no way fat. (Source)

When they preach a sermon, they are practically choosing their theological roots by what they say in the pulpit.  They may not use the same word of phrase, but their meaning is quite the same, and sometimes just as strong as Pelagius or Arminius of old.  Instead of wrestling with these ideas, Evangelicals today simply follow the crowd at chow time.  They eat what their pastors give them without any recourse to study what is being said or check if their pastor is right.  Instead, because of a charismata that is easier to feel than exegesis is to study, they are falling headlong into the abyss of Pelagian and Semi-Pelagian doctrine which is another Gospel, or no Gospel, altogether.  Entire Christian universities and theological schools have been given over to this blatant kind of religious humanism.  John Owen rightly said in his day, “Many at this day will condemn both Pelagius and the doctrine that he taught, in the words wherein he taught it, and yet embrace and approve of the things themselves which he intended.”[69]

However, though Owen said this four hundred years ago, it is more true today than it was at his time.  But there has been a change.  It is not that men deny Pelagianism, for most pastors have no idea what Pelagianism or Semi-Pelagianism is at all.  Rather, they simply believe the doctrines of Pelagius and Arminius at the expense of even knowing in which theological camp they are historically bound.  Truly, the Evangelical church today is captive.

It is impossible to deny the overwhelming degree that the church is under the Pelagian captivity of old.—Mick Russels

Researchmentalists theorize that Boogie-Foot’s prime habitation is in the Synagogue of Satan deep within Emergent Villages and that there may be others among them based on the victim’s testimony in the above interview. Little is known about Boogie-Foot other than what Discernmentalist Researchmentalists in the field of Sintology have observed using their herescopes. Although beard hair samples have been collected and tested by top Sintologists. The test results revealed just what we expected that it’s beard is unbiblical. Supposedly this particular one had spider arms. Putting all together what we know these TruthScoopers warn: Beware the Boogie-Foot that cometh lest the Reformation erode.

 

————-Julia Bottomman, AP


When Discernment Turns Extra Ugly – An Exclusive Alert!

April 29, 2019

discernment

It pains us to note that our very own Bible Bearing, Bible Belt wearing partner Take A Stand Ministries Eric Barger is noting that discernmentalism is getting ugly….we at ODMafia (with our keen sense of discernmentalism) note that it has take a new step towards Extra-Ugly.

But we won’t use the “H” word for “hypocrisy,” ….but we should.

Thank goodness that ODMafia has purer doctrines and sticks to the Bible.

Eric asks ‘When did “Guilt by Association” become “Apologetics?” 

Eric this is one of your premiere ways of discernmentalism – don’t abandon ship now! We are fearful Eric is having severe memory gaps (this is often the case with discernmentalists).

That is one of the prime tactics of Take A Stand Ministries expertize (emphasis with a “Z”).

Guilt By Association Examined….

If you cite a Roman Catholic you are a false teacher.

If you are friends with an emergent…you are an apostate.

If you had tea with Brian McLaren …you are on your way to hell, Canada or the Roman Catholic Church.

Truthslayer

PS Eric states “Scripture indicates that the early Church leaders experienced sharp disagreements but were able to work through their differences without maligning each other.” see here, & here:

… we are not finished….thankgoodness for our keen sense of discernmentalism part 2 to come!

 

 


Emerging Church Tied To Horrible Plane Crash…

September 22, 2011

This just goes to show just how far the Emerging Church will go to justify their ungodly rebellion against the Only True and Correct Doctrines.

New raw footage of last Friday’s deadly air show crash in Reno shows the doomed plane nosediving and exploding on audience.

Watch: Crowd screams ‘Oh my God’

In related news: The Emerging Church has also been tied to a brutally fatal shark attack. We have evidence just read this: “We saw the shark’s nose emerge and then the man just vanished. It was very sudden, then the animal just swam off. ” That’s just how sinisterly vile and disgusting these Emergent types are in their corruption of Pure Doctrine… They violently try to fight the Truth of Orthodoxy by leading people astray into apostasy. This is why we must fight this Truth War to protect God’s Truth from those infected by the Emerging Church disease.

All my researchmentalism on this subject has been “well-researched” so you should just take my word as Absolute Truth and fact. In fact, you all should thank God for this site and sites like the infallible Ken Silva’s CRN for our great and important research such as this article!  If you didn’t have us to Take A Stand on things such as this matter the Emerging hordes will destroy God’s Truth.


Breaking News: Gene Simmons Endorses Rob Bell’s Love Wins

April 20, 2011

– Gene Simmons of the Rock Band Kiss holds a copy of Rob Bell’s “Love Wins”

We have the scoop here before any other Discernmentalist blog on the Internet including the great and all powerful Ken Silva. Gene Simmons quote:  “If you go back and check all the reviews for all the icons of today — Elvis, the Beatles and so on — they were dismissed as flashes in the pans, this is why I support Rob Bell.” Of course that unregenerate reprobate would support Rob Bell as he also is blind to the Hard Truths of the Bible. Gene is on record as calling himself Dr. Love which is proof he believes Love Wins—-also he thinks he is the god of thunder… Blasphemous!

Question: if God is going to spare everyone, regardless of what they believe or don’t believe, then what does it matter what good we do or don’t do here on Earth? Then we’re going to have a blast in the future-present-pluperfect heaven with Mother Teresa, Hitler, and Gene Simmons. If God’s just going to give everyone a free pass, then there is no substantive reason for us to do anything good here on Earth except to avoid the harmful consequences of sin (an issue that Bell never takes to its Biblical conclusion).

Kiss’ unrepentant heretical Emergent theology:

We must put a stop to this but…

Unfortunately, if you disagree with Bell, you’re “toxic and misguided.”
Criticizing him makes you a “Pharisee,” according to Eugene Peterson.
A commenter on the above-linked page asks the critics, “Why are you so anxious to make sure there are people in hell? The fact that you NEED Bell to be wrong and have people in hell communicates much more about yourself than either Bell or God.”
No Bible-believing Christian wants people in hell, because that isn’t what God wants.
“Do you think, asks the Sovereign Lord, that I like to see wicked people die? Of course not! I only want them to turn from their wicked ways and live.” -Ezekiel 18:23
The reason that we need to be clear about the eternal consequences of denying Christ, which are real and revealed by the Scriptures, is because that’s what is at stake.
Jesus did not die a criminal’s death and rise from the grave so that we could all feel good about ourselves, have a nice life, drive fast cars, and be rich.
Jesus did not become a man so that his sacrifice could save the world from his bipolar father.
Jesus did what he did to save our souls (from the “Real Place” that is Hell).
That is the real story. That is the real truth.

More heretic Emergent theology from Kiss:


Chad Holtz And Mike Morrell’s Emergent Village Possibly Found

April 19, 2011

Our Research Robot Monkeys recently infiltrated an Emergent Cohort compound and discovered horrible abominations such as couches and candles. In this candle-lit ashram there were a bunch of scantily-clad men and women participating in the usual routine Emergent rituals of nude centering prayer (with much icons, incense, chanting, and apophatic silence). There was a lot of stretching going on and not in a good way. Our Research Robot Monkeys were horrified at all they saw and we are too. All we can say is Beware… Beware the Emergent Hordes and their Seeker-Sensitive Purpose-Driven lives!

Video of a typical Emergent Village pow-wow:


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