Farewell again @John Piper!

May 22, 2019

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The push of the social gospel is now reaching even those who have been staunch supporters of the work we do here at ODMafia. Our beloved and revered under leader of reformed theology, John Piper, has slipped the tracks. Abandoning the true faith for the man pleasing Gospel of Shane Claiborne. In the following video you will hear Pastor Piper declare to the “Young, Restless, and Reformed” crowd to not waste their lives on retirement. Instead he admonishes them to consider; clean water, homeless people, and the needy:

I too like my fellow Discernmentalists am becoming so tired of hearing people in the church talking about being on the social justice committee. There is a difference between justice and social justice! For one Social Justice is cultural marxism and every church needs to get on the same page and disavow themselves from using this leftest marxist terminology and simply call their churches work justice, plain and simple! Secondly Social justice sounds too like Satan’s doctrine: socialism…and you don’t clink glass with the devils cohort’s or entertain the devils terminology even when it sound all warm and fuzzy. “Idiots”!!!!

Are any of our Doctrines and fellow Reformed types safe from being perverted by the heretical hordes? Finally my faithful Truth Warriors I leave you this quote from our Beloved Over-leader John MacArthur (PBUH):

aspects of true justice are conspicuously missing from the recent evangelical dialogue touting “social justice.” Instead, what we hear is an echo of the same accusatory rhetoric and political slogans being shouted by secular social justice warriors. That fact ought to awaken the Berean urge in every Christian.


Wrath=Love!

April 20, 2019

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You dare question our unquestionable Doctrines sinners. We know that Wrath=Love as we’ve already presupposed this to be true (as we got our education from unaccredited colleges unlike you sinners who went to worldly schools; worked hard and actually earned a Real Doctoral Degree*) therefore you too must presuppose it to be true as well. Nevermind the fact that this isn’t found in the New Testament:

“Barth distances himself from classic substitution views, especially those stemming from Anselm. He acknowledges that the concept of punishment is present in Isaiah 53, but denies that it is present in the New Testament (a puzzling assertion, since he has used the term himself just earlier [223]). He then says this:

The decisive thing is not that He has suffered what we ought to have suffered so that we do not have to suffer it, the destruction to which we have fallen victim by our guilt, and therefore the punishment which we deserve. This is true, of course. But it is true only as it derives from the decisive thing that in the suffering and death of Jesus Christ it has come to pass that in His own person He has made an end of us as sinners and therefore of sin itself by going to death as the One who took our place as sinners. In His person He has delivered up us sinners and sin itself to destruction (253).

Earlier on the same page Barth also denies that the concept of satisfying God’s wrath is present in the New Testament. Thus my takeaway is this: Barth affirms a version of PSA, but not propitiation; and for Barth the penal element is peripheral, not central. The main thing for Barth is that Christ deals with our sin itself (and destroys it) by taking our places as the judged. Also, Barth’s version of PSA seems more oriented to Christ’s entire incarnate life, just just his death – this, and his frequent arguments from Christ’s “solidarity” with the world make his version of PSA sounds more compatible with a kind of recapitulation theme, as found in Irenaeus. Thus despite the similarity of language, at a very crucial juncture I think Barth’s doctrine of atonement must be seen as in a quite different category than classic PSA views in the reformed tradition. While I think some of his assertions stand in an ambiguous relationship with Scripture, I do find him an enlivening theological sparring partner, especially on the nature of the incarnation.”

Our Presuppositions are always correct.

*Our official Diploma of Presuppositional Apologetics:

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Good News: We Commendably Hate You!

April 19, 2019

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Spreading the Good News of our Sovereign God who sacrificed Himself to Himself to appease Himself of His own anger that He Himself has against His own creation doing what He Himself preordained them to do so that His Sovereign wrath might be satisfied.

We know Christ’s death satisfied God’s wrath because His wrath came to an end, after which Jesus was fully restored in glory.We know Christ’s death satisfied God’s wrath because His wrath came to an end, after which Jesus was fully restored in glory.[1] Now, sometimes when you talk about God being a God of wrath, certain people get disturbed.  And they don’t understand how God can be a God of anger, and God can be a God of wrath, and God can be a God of fury, a God of terror.  But that’s because they don’t understand God.  Let’s see if we can’t help ourselves to a deeper understanding of His wrath in perspective with all of His other attributes. God’s attributes are balanced in His divine perfection.  And they are perfectly balanced.  If God did not have wrath, and God did not have anger, then He would not be God.  God is perfect in love, on the one hand, and He is equally perfect in hate, on the other hand.  Just as totally as He loves, so totally does He hate.  As His love is unmixed, so is His hate unmixed.  Of Christ, it says in Hebrews 1:9, “Thou hast loved righteousness, and hated iniquity.”  And there is that perfect balance in the nature of God.  As I mentioned, one of the tragedies of Christianity in our time is a failure to preach the hatred of God, the judgment of God.  We’re so saccharine.  We’re so sentimental.  We’re so kind of mushy in our Christianity.  When is the last time you heard a new song on the wrath of God?  Heard one lately?  I haven’t.[2]—John MacArthur (PBUH) [1] [2]

Yet our God still remains angry—so angry with an unsatisfied anger and commendable hatred against all those sinners who refuse to bow down to our Pure Doctrines such as Happy Heretics like Matthew Distefano. In fact our God is still so angry with an unsatisfied commendable hatred that He threatens to come back any day smite sinners and pour down His unsatisfied angry wrath on them and throw all apostates into a Lake of Fire to burn for all eternity unless we share in His unsatisfied sovereign wrath and commendable hatred of all those not like us. This is why we of the Secret Order of Discernmentalists United in Ministry can say that we commendably hate you in the most biblical way in imitation of the unsatisfied wrath of our angry sovereign God.


John Piper On The Southeastern Storm System

April 18, 2011

(Reuters)- In a meeting of Discernmentalists with John Piper about the storm system that ravaged areas of the Southeast this weekend, Mike Morrell quasi-Mystical Universalist Emergence Guru and his Emergent Cohort were mentioned often. In the meeting Piper said that he believes that Emergent Cohorts and Emergent Postmodern types of Christians among the South are directly responsible for all the damage caused by this storm system. He is quoted as saying: ” The storm system in the Southeast was a gentle but firm warning to Emergents and Mike Morrell’s Emergent Cohort in particular: Turn from the approval of the sin of Postmodernism. Turn from the promotion of behaviors that lead to destruction.”

Piper is under the firm conviction that the storm system was a wake-up call and a taste of God’s Wrath being poured out to punish Emergent sinners for reading Rob Bell’s new book.  Sometime during the meeting Ken Silva overheard John Piper say: “Farewell Mike Morrell!”  Along with Ken Silva, several other top Discernmentalists were among the participants of the meeting including I. Todyaso and Don Jobson of the Online Discernmentalist Mafia who have already taken issue with Morrell’s Roman Catholic leanings and Emergent theology.


Collect the new ODMafia Troll dolls!

March 14, 2011

We have finally found a way to honor all the trolls ODMs out in the WWW. Troll dolls are cute and fun to collect. Be sure to get them quick before they are gone!

Here is our special for today… the Ken Silva troll doll!

Collect them all! Pastorboy aka (name withheld by request!), and Chris Rosebrough and many others!


Love Wins?

March 1, 2011

         

             A Blog Post by some of the Research Robot Monkeys

                          of the Online Discernmentalist Mafia:

Recently the ultra-mega sinfully ecumenical quasi-semi-Pelagian reprobated and heretical Universalist Emergent guru Rob Bell broke into the OD Mafia Headquarters. “Ho ho;” he said, “I’ve got Good News for you today…Love Wins.”

Alarmed by the disturbance our masters and heroes Dr. I . Todyaso, Dr. Truthslayer and Dr. Don Jobson quickly withdrew their weapons. Now brandishing their bullhorns in the manner of Todd Friel—they began to shout down that vile and Wretched sinner Rob Bell. Our heroes the OD Mafia proclaimed the True Gospel—the good news of God’s Absolute Sovereign Wrath and commendable hatred towards all those whose doctrines are impure and theology is incorrect.

All Rob Bell could say was “Love Wins…Love Wins…Love Wins…” Suddenly during the chaos Brian D. “amn your soul to hell” McLaren appeared in a mystical mist of confusion and grabbed the noble crew of the Online Discernmentalist Mafia and then disappeared. We haven’t seen or heard from either Dr. I . Todyaso, Dr. Truthslayer or Dr. Don Jobson ever since—although we suspect that those symbols of all that is evil in the world Rob Bell and Brian McLaren are holding them captive. The last thing we saw was Rob Bell driving off in a van laughing and calmly proclaiming that “Love Wins.”

P. S. If you see an Ice Cream Truck disguised as a traveling ministry with “Love Wins” painted on the side, please report the sighting to your nearest local Discernmentalist church.

            A. J. Research Robot Monkeys filling in for the OD Mafia


1 Hour Calvinizing guaranteed clean!

May 20, 2010

The ODMafia is now offering 1 hour Calvinizing to make sure you are clean before Jesus. Yes, make you Election sure with 1 hour Calvinizing!


What Biblically Verifiable Theology Looks Like

May 10, 2010

As True Christians and Discernmentalists, We must stand by our Absolute Biblical Truths like tearing others down when they stand in our way. Making fun of others when they are down in the dumps and kicking them even further is Absolutely Biblical. Using Absolute Biblical Certainty, We must stand up for these Hard Truths. Our Discernmentalist logic dictates that our theology must be Extreme by nature as our God is a very angry Sovereign God ready to pour down His Absolute Sovereign Wrath upon unsuspecting non-elected sinners at any time. Putting reprobates in their place is just part of our job as the Bible commands us to imitate our Father God in Heaven.

A video example of our Biblically verifiable theology.

We wish that crybaby reprobates would quit whining and complaining about their status as the losers of God’s Sovereign lottery of pre-determined Absolute Fatalism. God can and does get what He wants  as is His Sovereign Will and His good pleasure decrees so suck it up if you are on the losing end of God’s Absolute Sovereign Wrath as it was just Fate that you were Born to Lose. All of this is Biblically verifiable theology as We back up our Extreme Theology with the Hard Truths of the Bible and Bible-Based STRETCH Technology. This is why our Extreme approach to everything works and why We must take a stand against those trying to water down theology with love as you can’t save anyone by loving up on them. You’ve got to tell them the Truth like John MacArthur—the Hard Truth that God hates them and is so angry with their sinful ways that He could threaten to pour down His wrath upon them at any moment unless they are Elect and therefore able to repent.


New Discernmentalist Products For Females

April 19, 2010

We Know no woman is complete without a man. This is an Absolute Inerrant Biblical Truth. Why? We don’t even have to tell you, because God said it in the Holy Inerrant and Infallible Bible so that settles it. That is the final answer—end of debate—end of discussion. We have the  Absolute Truth of all things all figured out like that—all wrapped up in a nice little black leather package with a red ribbon attached—but just in case you wish to try and debate us (though you will fail because God is truly on our side), we have these fine new Quality Discernmentalist media products for you and the women in your life:

Women need a man because the word man is in the word woman. Guys, having trouble convincing women that they need you because it is God’s Plan for you to control them? Women, do you think you can scrape  by trusting on your own merits and therefore living in the sin that you can be saved by your own works (I Timothy 2:15)? Having trouble finding a truly Biblical and Discernmentalist husband? Never fear we have created this video guide for the proper education of women’s Bible-based role  of being a man’s property.  Introducing The Discernmentalist Guide For Females On Finding A Biblically Correct And Discernmentalist Husband from the creators of  Who Wants to Marry a Multi-Discernmentalist?:

Men already have a wife—well now you need to show her her proper Bible-Based role as your slave. Women already landed a husband—well now you need to know him as your master and overlord (Ephesians 5:22-24 and  I Timothy 2:9-15). Take the next step with our Discernmentalist Guide For Females On Their Proper  Biblical Role As Their Husband’s Slave And Property:

But wait there is more—for futher steps go to Discernmentalist Tube.


Brannon Howse discusses with Jan Markell this VERY BIG question

April 14, 2010

Worldview Matters with Brannon Howse discusses with Jan Markell this VERY BIG question…..are you ready????

Why is “John Piper inviting Rick Warren to speak at his national conference. Why would John Piper do this?”

WHY? WHY? WHY?

How could Piper lower himself to speak to someone who does not have the IDENTICAL DOCTRINES as he has? We know that Rick Warren is secretly planning to build the NEW WORLD ORDER. We know that Rick Warren has a heart for the poor (which we know means that he is an out of the closet liberal). So why would Piper submit himself to a get together with Warren?

We suggest that Piper should have gotten PERMISSION first from the BRANNON HOWSE SOCIETY of PERFECT DOCTRINE. Then, with a special permission slip, BRANNON HOWSE could have officially rejected this offer barring Piper from speaking to the horrendous Rick Warren who is destroying the western world as we know it. Therefore we would not be dealing with this tough, thought wrenching, perplexing, deep pondering of  “WHY”

Truthslayer


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