Breaking: Unbiblical Cereal Persecuting Discernmentalists!

October 26, 2019

BelongTogetherCereal

We all belong together. So for the first time in history, our famous mascots and cereals are offered exclusively together in the same box for All Together Cereal. It’s a symbol of acceptance no matter how you look, where you’re from or who you love.

Oh the horror is there any object that doesn’t offend us or persecute us! This is worse than when fictional cartoon rats got ghey-married causing hetero-marriages to fail by osmosis! Noted Discernmentlist Ken Ham declared: “We are not “All together,” as the lifestyle/worldview of these fictional cereal mascots is anti-God, anti-biblical & anti-science and consists of only a small minority in the culture.” As my co-Truthwarrior Dr. Truthslayer has pointed out: “We demand that this cereal be stopped!!! We can only guess that some time soon they will introduce whole grain oats, barley, and maize to this liberal mix. Its processed whole-wheat or nothing!!!”

In fact we know this as one Kellogian stated: “Just think now KIDS might get the idea to buy 6 separate boxes of cereal, and mix them up on their own! Kellog’s is now working for the Devil! No more Kelloggs! They are evil, because any of their cereals might get mixed!!! Leading kids to proclaim: Hail Satan!” If this doesn’t make clear how unbiblical and apostate this cereal really is—consider this—our Research Robot Monkeys overheard this apostate cereal saying:

“Black, white, green, red
Can I take my friend to bed?
Pink, brown, yellow, orange, and blue
I love you”

We only wish that more inanimate objects; fictional characters; even animals would hold true to our morals; Doctrines and worldview. We have one word of caution—if you see this cereal in stores…flee!

To counteract this assault on our Truth—we recommend a daily dose of Calvin Crunch; Reformation Crunch; Truth Loops; Catacomb; and Christo-Fascist Flakes for a more Biblically-sound all around healthy breakfast and extra-protection from wetness!


Solo Scriptura: A Guide To Discernmentalist Bible Interpretation

October 22, 2019

 

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We Discernmentalists believe in Solo Scriptura as in only our interpretation of the Bible alone as only our interpretation matters or counts for our beliefs are God’s as we follow:
Solo Scriptura. The whole Bible. Be real and stop your deception. Either follow the whole Bible or leave the Christian faith. I do not want a cut and paste faith. That is no faith at all.
However we being good Bible-Believing Conservatives and Internet Discernmentalists like our faith cut and paste as only we have license to practice a cut and paste faith using Solo Scriptura such as:
  • The Bible is clear: “Drink a little wine to settle thy stomach and greet each-other with a Holy kiss.”—never mind alcoholics and the drinking age being 21 nor pedophiles using the Holy kiss as an excuse to molest children—Paul said it that settles it. (Solo scriptura out of context the whole Bible)
  • Or our support of capitalism and voting straight ticket Republican every election despite the Bible’s Clear Teaching that usury aka making profits is an abomination
  • Or how we explain away the Bible’s Clear Teachings to turn the other cheek; lay down our weapons and study war no more
  • Or how we disagree with the Clear Teaching and Plain Language in the Bible that Christ is Really Present in the wine and bread as we believe its only symbolic: “And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, This is my body given for you…” (Notice it doesn’t say this is only a symbol of my body)
  • Or how we believe God only loves the saved despite John 3:16 using the word κόσμος (which literally means universe) not ἐκλεκτός (Elect) nor ἐκκλησία (church/assembly)
  • Or how we prefer to spank our children as punishment instead of the Bible’s Clear Teaching on stoning them
  • Or how we believe in a Limited Atonement despite the Bible’s Clear Teaching:  Behold, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!” (Notice it doesn’t say takes away the sin of the Elect/saved/church only)
  • Or how we explain away OT Laws by consigning those too HARD for us to follow as being part of a ceremonial law not a moral one despite the Bible never making any distinction between any OT Law: the Law is the Law period.
  • Or how we believe life begins at conception even-though the Bible’s Clear Teaching Plainly teaches that life begins at first breath
  • Or how we exhort our enemies to follow Romans 13 while celebrating our country whose very Founders disobeyed it by rebelling against the King of England
  • Or how we believe in Premilennial Dispensationalism/Rapture teaching despite it being found nowhere in the Bible
  • Or how we claim that baptism doesn’t have anything to do with salvation despite the Clear and Plain language of the Bible: “1 Peter 3:21- And baptism, which this prefigured, now saves you—not as a removal of dirt from the body, but as an appeal to God for[a] a good conscience, through the resurrection of Jesus Christ, ” (Solo scriptura out of context the whole Bible)

As you can see our Solo Scriptura is correct as we are inerrant—we like the parts of scripture we agree with and doesn’t disrupt our comfortable Conservative American lifestyle—and choose not to follow those that do. However everyone else else needs to follow the whole Bible or else leave the Paulican Biblian Discernmentalist Christian faith. (Solo scriptura out of context)

 


Discernmentalist Values…

October 20, 2019

Brannon Howse: …I’ve been dealing with the issue of social justice, the social Gospel, collectivism, globalism, internationalism, statism, whatever you want to call it. It’s a lot of the same thing, saving socialism, for many, many years. I’ve been writing and speaking now for close to 30 years. 28 years I think to be precise, and written several books, and I’m not one of these guys that just writes books to have books to write. I try to write books that are very pertinent and timely and if I don’t write a book for a few years that’s fine, but after so many years of studying this and watching the things from the left come within mainstream Evangelicalism, yes we know that the mainline liberal churches are doing all this, but now to watch social justice, socialism, redistribution of wealth, the pushing of reparations, which is going to be a tax to try to make up for slavery, reparations in America, that’ll be a part of a Reagan-type campaign by the Marxists. Mandatory minimum incomes, that’ll be again something that’s being really promoted by groups like the Gospel Coalition, and again who would oppose it when it’s coming from a group like the Gospel Coalition with well-known Evangelicals involved They’re pushing all these things and more, and this is in the mainstream Evangelical area. Guys like Jim Wallace, Ron Sider, Tony Campolo, who have always been on the far left and promoting and praising pretty much every Communist revolution in South America, claiming the Anti-Communists were part of the dark forces, all these guys who were in the ’80s seen as being what they were, leftist Neo-Marxist, and now they’ve come mainstream into Evangelicalism and people we never thought are locking arms with them and literally working with them and serving on boards and committees together, and so I’m seeing the merging of Marxism with Christianity. …One (false idea) would be this idea that we owe the poor as much money as we can give them. There’s an article in Christianity Today a few years ago where Tim Keller is being interviewed and he said that. “We owe the poor as much money as we can give them.” That’s nowhere in the Bible. These guys take a lot of verses in the New Testament dealing with the New Testament Church and they take the word poor, which often is dealing with the spiritual poor, the spiritual bankrupt, the beggar who cannot save himself, he’s spiritually bankrupt. That’s why Christ cried out on the cross, “It is finished. Debt paid in full.” Banking term. The righteous life of Christ can be imputed or credited to your account through faith and repentance, two sides of a coin. “By grace, through faith you’re saved. Now of yourself, [inaudible 00:06:54].” He mentioned both. That was a banking term. It’s a transaction. Debt paid in full. It’s done. “We’ve been put on the auction block and we were on the auction block and our master was sin. We’ve been purchased with a price. We are not our own. Christ bought us with His own blood.” These verses that deal with the poor are often the spiritual poor, the spiritual bankrupt, the beggar. They want to take them and say that we need to give to the poor and help the poor, and they take a lot of Scripture out of context to do it. Matthew 25 is one of their favorites. “I was naked. I was in prison,” all this. That’s Jesus dividing the kingdom. Excuse me, Jesus setting up His kingdom. At the second coming, dividing the sheep from the goats. Again, they take Scripture out of context. There’s not one verse in the New Testament says that the New Testament Church is to redistribute its limited resources to the unsafe poor. Now that does not mean that we cannot be helping unsafe poor people as a platform the Gospel, but no call for redistribution of wealth to the unsafe poor but definitely to care for the poor inside the New Testament Church.

Sam Rohrer: The insidious cloaking and mixing of economics, wealth, and power and money on one hand, which is within the purview of the jurisdiction of civil government, with the Biblical concern for the poor, the needy, and those who are without, which are within the purview and responsibility of the Church, the mixing of these two is one major strategy of cultural Marxism, but it’s the inappropriate mixing as they do. The Bible’s clear on all matters of life and living, and if carefully applied, will always bring the results that God promises.” (Source)

We proudly support Discernmentalist Values. We support taking Scriptures out of context to support Capitalism as everyone knows capitalism is Biblical. We know the Crucified Christ approves of this. We know the Reformers would support us in our anti-Social Justice gospel as Luther said:

 “He who has nothing to live should be aided. If he deceives us, what then? He must be aided again.”

“ . . . In a well-arranged commonwealth the debts of the poor who are in need ought to be cancelled, and they ought to be helped; hence the action of collecting has its place only against the lazy and the ne’er-do-well” (“Lectures on Deuteronomy”).

So remember to uncritically support:

  • Free-market Capitalism instead of Social Justice.
  • War-mongering instead of peace-making
  • Corporate slavery instead of freedom
  • Ignorance instead of education
  • Conspiracy Theories instead of facts
  • Fake News instead of reality and Truth

Ignorance is our strength—it’s the Discernmentalist Way!

ODMafia approved


Breaking: Emergents now attacking Truth Warriors with Psychic Powers!

July 24, 2019

epsych

Oh the horror! Recently one of our Research Robot Monkeys noted that Emergents are now hiring psychics in a last ditch effort to undermine the Absolute Truth and Certainty of the Truth Wars. We here at the ODMafia can’t say we didn’t see this coming from a mile away as we know Emerging emergers love their mystical webs of confusion. Emergents also love Mystery over Certainty as well as coffee; candles and couches—but they’ve yet to be observed in the presence of garlic. We also have reason to suspect that these Emerging vampires have merged with Mothra feminists in order to ramp up their newly found psychic abilities in order to assault unsuspecting Truth Warriors in the field of battle for our Truth. Other noted ODMs are now in the midst of battling for our Truth—researchmentalizing new techniques in Spiritual Warfare to curb these assaults.


Vatican spiritually terrorizing Bible-Believers with Pornographic art

May 17, 2019

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Photo from  Mrs. Jobson’s old college textbookLINK

Ray Comfort (Awesome) Hell’s Best Kept Secret warns that the Vatican is spiritually terrorizing innocent Bible-Believers with pornographic art. Quote: “It’s dishonest to steal God’s ideas and say they came from nothing. Especially if one is going to paint or sculpt nude figures that might cause others to lust in their heart. Michelangelo’s Statue of David is obscene because its essentially pornographic as well as the Sistine Chapel.” Ray (Awesome)’s original quote on this from his Comfort Blog (Awesome) has been raptured into an atheist black hole so we pressed him to make a new statement on this—while working on our version of that sinful Arthur episode.

Thankfully Mrs. Jobson’s old college textbook on artwork censors all those smutty pics and sculptures so our house is lust-free. That reminds me of a funny story from when our son little Calvin was 8… we always read from the Old Testament for bed time stories to put our children to sleep… so he knows to stay clear of idolatry…. *chuckle*…Anyways Calvin was playing outside when he caught a glimpse of our apostate neighbor’s statue of a little girl and little boy kissing so he got it in his head and he smashed it….heh heh. Our son the Little Iconoclast!

On a related note Ray (Awesome) wanted us to plug his Awesome Bible-based art (Awesome):


Extra! Extra! Smocking Gun: Pulpit & Pen/Planned Parenthood One and the Same! More Evidence…

May 13, 2019

pp

It took longer to recharge our Research Robot Monkeys than we thought as we had to recalibrate Eric Barger’s Smocking Gun machine for them to use. Afterwards they stumbled upon this quote attributed to our boogie man George Soros on a highly questionable site run by QAnon members which means it must be authentic and not a manufactured quote that we made up  by ourselves. This proves the smocking guns against Party & Propaganda aka Bulpit and Pen now Planned Pulpithood (PP) that Eric Barger’s machine found since George Soros (Nazi man in picture in his 20s when Soros was around 9 years old at the outbreak of WWII) funds abortionists and crisis actors.

In fact Planned Pulpithood themselves have stated that  George Soros (Nazi man in picture in his 20s when Soros was around 9 years old at the outbreak of WWII) who funds abortionists and crisis actors also funds Evangelicalism and SBC groups of which Planned Pulpithood are a part of. Quote:

Pulpit & Pen (aka now as Planned Pulpithood) has been exposing George Soros’ funding and partnership of Russell Moore and James Riady’s funding of Ligon Duncan. In reality, both Soros and Riady have been funding numerous groups and speakers who are represented at the The Gospel Coalition, Together for the Gospel, and the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission. However, much of their funding is “Dark Money” contributions that come not directly from Soros or Riady, but from a series of “foundations” (sometimes the cash goes through nearly a dozen foundations before it reaches institutions like SBTS, TGC, the ERLC or RTS).

We also now have reason to suspect that George Soros (Globalist Billionaire) funded the people that inserted liberal unbiblical Bible verses such as these into our Pure Bibles:

  • “Learn to do good; seek justice, correct oppression; bring justice to the fatherless, and please the widow’s cause,” (Isaiah 1:17).
  • “He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8).
  • “But woe to you Pharisees! For you tithe mint and rue and every herb, and neglect justice and the love of God. These you ought to have done, without neglecting the others,” (Luke 11:42).

Is their anything Planned Pulpithood via George Soros (Globalist Billionaire)’s funding will do to destroy the purity of Doctrines? I’m sure also that George Soros (Globalist Billionaire) funded the internet to fabricate pro-Social Justice quotes by Luther and Calvin as well.

“After the devil there is no greater human enemy on earth than a miser and usurer, for he desires to be above everyone. Turks, soldiers, and tyrants are also evil men, yet they must allow the people to live . . . ; indeed, they must now and then be somewhat merciful. But a usurer and miser—belly desires that the entire world be ruined in order that there be hunger, thirst, misery, and need so that he can have everything and so that everyone must depend upon him and be his slave as if he were God.” “Daily the poor are defrauded. New burdens and high prices are imposed. Everyone misuses the market in his own willful, conceited, arrogant way, as if it were his right and privilege to sell his goods as dearly as he pleases without a word of criticism.” “He who has nothing to live should be aided. If he deceives us, what then? He must be aided again.” —Luther on Usury

Thankfully there’s no real dirt on the Billionaires that fund our pet causes.


Now Offering Our All New Apoolajetix Course!

May 1, 2019

emerging-church

Pomotivator from the once mighty Hugh Jass Spurgeon site of Phil Johnson—now gone just like his Hugh Jass though he still is a Hugh Jass every now and then. *

 

Reliving our glory days of the Truth War—Dr. I. Todyaso is proud to introduce our newest old course on apologetics aka Apoolajetix to help aid new and future Truth Warriors/Discernmentalists in their Researchmentalism in the defense of our fragile Pure Doctrines that are always under attack and in need of being defended by us:

Pooling together our ignorance from around the web via Eric Barger’s Bible-Based Satellite System (BS) and Stretch Technology we can find the Answers In Genesis to all the problems we need to Take A Stand on with our Pulpit & Pen. Helping us Slice any truth to fit our narrative in our Battle 4 Truth that we’ve already presupposed to be true and need to be Apprising everyone of.  We must Stand Up For our The Truth and always be Defending (and) Contending for this truth using our Christian Research Network of True Bible Believers —who help spread our Doctrines via Lighthouse Trails and our seminars at Wordview Weekend through the administration of our annual Worldview Tests/Checkups.

We need to be Pyromaniacs for our truth but without Charisma just like any real Christian Apologetics and Research Ministry —we should follow the Way Of The Master that leads to Living Waters like Ray Comfort Hell’s Best Kept Secret instead of doing real research as real research leads to unWretched ideas. One of these ideas is forming a Gospel Coalition around Social Justice and social issues like ending hunger and poverty alleviation —pure blasphemy as the only real social issue that one Desiring God should care about is that we Abolish Human Abortion  just like our Angry Sovereign God desires.

This will help us be Rapture Ready—for Jesus Is Savior of the American Vision of Gary North and Thomas DiLorenzo which is the same as ours and helps us to Act for America by our Stand With Israel and being WallBuilders to protect our beliefs from the same government that we use to spread our Doctrines. Also remember to only get your news from Fox News; Breitbart; World Net Daily or any other Conservative approved (except for Libertarian) news source and remember to listen to Rush Limbaugh; Info Wars and Michael Savage on the radio everyday and like Eric Metaxas and Dinesh D’Souza read our Most Biblical and Godly President’s Tweets everyday as well in order to keep our Doctrines as Pure as the Puritan Hard Drive for we all know that we discernmentalists are really the Alpha & Omega of our own truth.

However you should never under any circumstances go to sites such as Scott McKnight’s; Warren Throckmorton’s;  David Gushee’s or Christ And Pop Culture nor any other site that discernmentalists have Quall(ed)Out and disapproved of as that might lead to the Bible Gateway into biblical scholarship  or worse you  may discover Catholic Answers instead of ones approved by us—besides everyone knows we discermentalists like to avoid the Bible especially Act(s)3 as much as possible whenever a Spurgeon quote will suffice like most of the online followers of Grace To You  believe.

This our subservient students is the secret to defending our fragile hard doctrines of True Biblical Christianity that is our Extreme Theology of Monergism wedded with Ayn Rand’s Objectivism (the only Conservative approved Libertarian/Independent thinker besides those who support Theocracy like the Constitution Party—despite her views on abortion and her not believing in our angry Sovereign Grace-filled God of wrath) which  are always being perverted; always under attack by our many enemies and always in need of defense by us.

————–

Drs. I. Todyaso; Truthslayer and Don Jobson—Doctors of Apoolajetix

*Phil’s Hugh Jass Pomotivators

An unrelated post from our past related to this one: Brian McLaren declares the Kingdom of God is here and now!


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