Brannon Howse uses a page out of Alinsky’s Handbook: People’s Cube in revolt!

April 21, 2011

Last year, around the time that Glenn Beck was organizing his “Restoring Honor” rally on the National Mall, concern started bubbling up from the Religious Right fringes about Beck’s Mormon faith, especially from people like Brannon Howse, president and founder of Worldview Weekend, who started using his radio program to attack Mormonism as “America’s Islam” and warn that Beck was spreading “anti-Biblical beliefs.”

Saul Alinsky People’s Cube’s sworn enemy couldn’t have done this any better as here are Brannon Howse’s personal rules to live by:

  1. Always remember the first rule of power tactics: Power is not only what you have but what the enemy thinks you have.
  2. Second: Never go outside the experience of your people. Wherever possible go outside of the experience of the enemy.
  3. 3rd: Here you want to cause confusion, fear, and retreat.
  4. The fourth rule carries within it the fifth rule: Ridicule is man’s most potent weapon.
  5. Finally, Pick the target, freeze it, personalize it, and polarize it.

We wonder if People’s Cube will add any of Brannon Howse’s books to their book-burning list. Repent before it’s too late—The End is Nigh!


Please Raise Your Right Hand For Our Holy Anthem!

January 8, 2011

This is our story…this is our song…praising our Noble God-Ordained Country all the day long!

Quote: “We are appalled at the amount of liberalism permeating the world today. Liberalism and its idea of a secular humanist theocracy are a threat to the one true faith everywhere, and must be destroyed by whatever means necessary. Sarah Palin has been ordained by God to restore moral values to our nation and purge Satan from our government once and for all! We believe that Sarah Palin is God’s ordained president to bring Christian Reconstruction teachings to reality, and that under her, Jesus will begin to smile again.”

P. S. Please remember to vote in True Bible-Believing Conservatives in the next election and that would be us: God’s Only Inerrant Party!


Science-Free Medicine!!!

July 19, 2010

Are you as horrified as us over the Obamanation of ObamaCare? Are you tired of pseudo-scientific advances in Medicine? Have we got the answer for you—science-free medicine activated only by biblical faith because secular medicine is an assault:

  • an assault on the Bible
  • an assault on the Absolute Truth
  • an assault on our Faith
  • an assault on traditional American values
  • an assault on Freedom
  • an assault on our right to be stupid practice Bible-Based Science
  • and yes even an assault on our angry Sovereign God’s wrath and Law against sinners

Other reasons to get on board Science-Free Medicine today: Secular pseudo-scientists say that the microbes that attack our bodies are ever-evolving lifeforms which is why these evolutionary pseudo-scientists have to keep inventing new antibiotics. Isn’t that just evil? Can you say “placebo”? We Know this is just ignorance on the part of evilutionists—trying to educate people make up lies to disseminate prop up scientific truth their delusional fairy-tales. Besides would you want pseudo-scientists sticking strange needles and/or pills in you? Who knows they could be giving you the Mark of the Beast especially if they’re Roman Catholic doctors. We Know that microbes, germs, bacteria, viruses and diseases are all caused by sin and they don’t evolve at all as evolution never happens just as the Bible says. Just as God literally created the universe and everything within it unchangeable and as absolute static forms in 6 literal 24-hour days—God allows microbes, germs, bacteria, viruses and diseases to remain unchanged in order to punish vile, wretched and wicked sinners whose destruction we should all rejoice in.

Another reason to back our Science-Free Medicine is that secular medical science denies Absolute Biblical Truths already succinctly illustrated above. After infiltrating a pseudo-scientific lab full of evolutionary Emergent doctors, Our Research Robot Monkeys also noted the following:

Secular Medical Science and secular health care are so bankrupt that many are abandoning them to embrace New Age Mystical healing gooble-de-gook. Secular and New Age medicine is the new savior. Problems that were once blamed on individual sin and familial genetic sin (Original Sin) are now charged to chemical imbalances and disorders. Yesterday’s medical science and today’s medical science share the same fatal errors–they reject the total depravity of man due to sin; they treat the symptoms instead of the heart; and they aim for change that is not true sanctification. In spite of obvious failure, the notion prevails within the church that secular medicine and secular health care are more effective agents of change–particularly in dealing with the most difficult cases of illnesses–than the Holy Spirit who sanctifies. But can secular medicine and secular health care possibly accomplish something the Holy Spirit cannot? Can an earthly doctor achieve more than a heavenly Comforter? Is medicine more helpful than sanctification? Of course not.

Last but not least, the symbol of Secular Medicine is not only Pagan in orgin but also Occultic and Gnostic in origin and as We all Know Gnosticism is a heresy. If that isn’t enough to reject the evil and sinister cabals of Secular Medical Pseudo-Science whole scale then you must be a servant of Satan—so remember Science-Free Medicine for all your Bible-Based Faith-Healing needs where our motto is: “we’ll lock you in a closet and scream and yell Bible verses at you until you repent of your sins and get saved/cured/healed from your illnesses or else.” Warning if our Bible-Based Healing methods don’t work for you then it means you lack TRUE Biblical Faith and most likely weren’t meant to be healed to begin with.


PROJECT DUMBO! revealled….

June 7, 2010

Our Research Robot Monkeys have discovered that a consortium of Online Discernment Ministries have devised a new listening device to eaves drop in on the emerging church: PROJECT DUMBO. There are reports that an authentic Dan Kimball sermon has been intercepted, and the following statements have been deduced “Then this is a day of independence for all the Munchkins and their descendants!” “come here my little pretty” and “Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.” We cannot substantiate these quotes nor do we need to verify them due to the ODM code of misconduct. Fact checking is not our style (plus its unbiblical)….but can only note that the quotes must be true if an ODM quoted them.

NSA has also expressed interest in this device.

Truthslayer


Martin Luther Backs Socialists: Chapter The First

June 2, 2010

 

We are proud to present to you a moment from Discernmentalist Revised History uncut and uncensored: This is a tale about the Original Tea Partiers 4 Jesus and how they revolted against the Big  Bad Government and the Big Name who stood against them and opposed them. The cast of characters include: a bunch of peasants (the Original Tea Partiers 4 Jesus), the Holy Roman Emperor (Big Brother) and the Big Name who stood with Big Brother against the Original Tea Partiers 4 Jesus—that Big Name of course is Martin Luther (evil Neo-Marxist Red-Letter Christian prototype).

Our tale is a tale of sadness and woe; torture and families; the rich and the poor; the old and young; of death and taxes. Our tale begins in 1524 when the Peasants (Tea Partiers 4 Jesus) who were fed up with being heavily taxed decided to rebel (but not in a Romans 13-denying way as Romans 13 doesn’t apply to the rebellions of Conservative Bible-Believers only Liberals and Theologians who lied to Hitler to protect Jews even John MacArthur told us so) against the Holy Roman Emperor (the Big Bad Evil Socialist Government).

At first Martin Luther (our anti-hero and anti-Reagan of this story) agreed that the Peasants (Tea Partiers 4 Jesus) deserved a break from their taxes especially those who were extremely wealthy by Medieval standards (meaning they privately owned at least one cow)—so all the Peasants (Tea Partiers 4 Jesus) drew up a plan to lobby for tax cuts for the richest and most wealthiest among them. I mean why should they have to share their privately owned cattle or any other privately owned property with the government that only protects them and makes them secure. Why should they have to share with anyone for that matter as  sharing is Communism and as we all know:

The Bible mandates free market capitalism. It is anti-socialist. When Christianity adheres to the judicial specifics of the Bible, it produces free market capitalism.

On the other hand, when Christianity rejects the judicial specifics of the Bible, it produces socialism or some politically run hybrid “middle way” between capitalism and socialism, where politicians and bureaucrats make the big decisions about how people’s wealth will be allocated. Economic growth then slows or is reversed. Always.

To be continued in the next exciting part of our installments of  Discernmentalist Revised History—stay tuned for the conclusion of our tale in Martin Luther Backs Socialists: Chapter The Second…


1 Hour Calvinizing guaranteed clean!

May 20, 2010

The ODMafia is now offering 1 hour Calvinizing to make sure you are clean before Jesus. Yes, make you Election sure with 1 hour Calvinizing!


Bow down to the King of kings… OR ELSE!

May 17, 2010

One of the greatest theologians of our day Lemmy, has written the greatest ODM worship song ever. Enjoy!


Warning Ken Silva May Cause Death

May 12, 2010

 

Recently it has been brought to our attention that Ken Silva may in fact cause death. Perhaps because as a fellow Truth Warrior he is so close to the Absolute Truth that he is able to absorb God’s Absolute Sovereign Wrath like a lighting rod. After absorbing and storing up enough of God’s Absolute Sovereign Wrath, he would then be able to reflect it like any good Static conductor of Absolute Truth will and then bounce it back off of him into those that attack our Truth.

For it is Written in the Truth Warrior Bible:

 “What if God, willing to show His Absolute Sovereign Wrath, and to make His Absolute Power known has Chosen and Frozen a select few Truth Warriors to be retrofitted wth Superhuman Absolute Truth and Wrath absorbing powers so that they may endure with much long-suffering the vessels of wrath fitted to destruction only to and all for His (God’s) Absolute Glory?”

Another way Ken can cause death is by using one of our Truth Rods and smacking apostate reprobates so full of the Absolute Truth that they give up the ghost:

However we propose it is the former rather than the latter as it is also Written in the Truth Warrior Bible that:

“The Lord is so angry with apostate reprobate sinners 1 that He will kill anyone among them who attack the Absolute Truth or reach out their hands to touch His Holy annointed Arks:  any of the select few specially chosen Truth Warriors that have been retrofitted wth Superhuman Absolute Truth and Wrath absorbing powers!”

Certainly Ken Silva with his closeness to the Absolute Truth is among  those of the select few specially chosen Truth Warriors that have been retrofitted wth Superhuman Absolute Truth and Wrath absorbing powers that can cause anyone’s death.

P. S. And also remember to check out our newest Discernmentalist film on Absolute Truth: “They Came From Beyond….Modernism” and our latest greatest promotion ever!


How to dehorn an emergent

May 4, 2010


Dehorning an emergent is much like dehorning a cow

There are different methods from removing the horns, or dehorning, an emergent – the simplest being not letting your young fundamentalist be turned toward emerging. When this is not an option, you can now make a choice as to what method to use to dehorn an emergent.
Difficulty: Challenging
Instructions
Chemical Method of Dehorning
1. Step 1
Push back the hair that covers the horn bud on the young emergent.
2. Step 2
Use a brush to apply caustic potash or caustic soda to the horn buttons.
3. Step 3
Choose whether to have the hair fall back over the horn bud after applying the caustic, or clipping the hair back altogether. Some have found that the hair helps to keep the caustic in place, and prevents the caustic from irritating the older emergents.
4. Step 4
Avoid getting any of the caustic in the emergent’s eyes. Always wear gloves when applying the chemical. Wait for sunny days to apply the chemical on the emergent as rain can wash the chemicals from the horn buds.
Hot Iron Method of Dehorning
5. Step 1
Use a hot iron for dehorning an emergent if they are a little older. Also use anesthesia in conjunction with the iron, especially on the older emergents. Carefully check that the iron is working well before applying it to the emergent. A unit that is too hot can cause brain damage in the emergent which will also aid you in bringing them back to fundamentalism.
6. Step 2
Hold the hot iron against each horn bud for 10 to 15 seconds. A copper-colored ring will appear.
7. Step 3
Observe the emergent. After 4 to 6 weeks, the horn button will fall off.
Spoon or Tube of Dehorning
8. Step 1
Make sure you use the proper sized tube for the horn for dehorning. There are four sizes available. The tube should fit over the horn bud, as well as 1/8 inch of skin around the base of the horn bud.
9. Step 2
Place the cutting edge so that it is straight down over the horn bud.
10. Step 3
Twist and push the tube until you cut through the skin, then cut under the horn button and remove it.
11. Step 4
Apply an antiseptic to help prevent infection.
Barnes Method of Dehorning
12. Step 1
Fit the knives over the horns of the young emergent or older one by closing the handles of the Barnes-type dehorners. You will want to remove a ring of skin at the same time as the horn.
13. Step 2
Spread the handles apart as quickly as you can manage. This engages the knives, which cut off the horn.
14. Step 3
Make sure the blades are sharp before this procedure. Use anesthesia as well as make sure the emergent is properly restrained.
15. Step 4
Stop the bleeding by either using forceps to pull the artery, or a hot iron.

Yes, it is just that easy to dehorn an emergent.

Original article here


Rick Warren’s Newest Sinister Plot Discovered

April 20, 2010

Rick Warren plans to unleash Purpose Driven Baseball upon the world. Oh the sheer horror! We Know that like life baseball should be kept as Purposeless as humanly possible. John MacArthur teaches this essential Absolute Biblical Truth when he says:

People have to understand that salvation is not being delivered from bad feelings or the lack of self-esteem or and unimportant life or a purpose-less life or a less than fulfillment. Salvation is deliverance from the eternal wrath of God and everlasting Hell. You have got to get the message right. First of all as to the condition of the sinner and the remedy also in Christ.

We agree that the purpose driven life has no gospel in it as God doesn’t have a plan or purpose for your life. Todd Friel  adds:

God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life. No, God does not love you and does not have a wonderful plan for your life. The only promises for the convert are trials, temptation and persecution. If that is how you define a wonderful life, fine. Otherwise we must command all men everywhere to repent and trust.

This is why we must take a stand in God’s Absolute Sovereign Wrath against Rick Warren’s hideous plans for Purpose Driven Baseball:


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