We Know that Pokémon and Roleplaying Games in general are evil tools of Satan and the Anti-Christ. We Know that Dungeons & Dragons is a gateway to the Occult and Socialism but we are very wary of Card-Based Roleplaying Games as well as they can lead to gambling. Pokémon is one of the worst as not only does this franchise promote the Occult and gambling but also evilution. This is why in order to be relevant to those seduced by these tools of Satan (but not relevant in an Emergent way), we’ve teamed up with David Tate to bring you a quality Discernmentalist card game for True Christians (Conservatives)—introducing Discernmentalist Power Cards.
A rare Discernmentalist Power Card in Japanese explaining the history of God’s Only Inerrant Party to the Japanese and why we must take back Japan for Jesus. We don’t need any more Japanese cartoons corrupting our children to the Occult though we admire their Biblically correct Capitalistic ways. Notice the inversion of a GOIP symbol on the top left corner of the card—it is on there to subconsciously reinforce our Bible-Based Theocratic message.
Discernmentalist Power Cards is a Card-Based Roleplaying type game which offers Absolutely True Factual Discernmentalist information to players. Discernmentalist facts that players will learn:
- The Absolute Truth aka our Infallible and Inerrant interpretation of the Holy Bible—the only True Word Of God
- Capitalist values such as legalized gambling of other people’s futures away
- the American Gospel
- Pure Doctrines
- True Doctrine is only hundreds of years old instead of thousands
- The Gospel (Good News) is Dortian Supralapsarian Calvinism not God’s Revelation of God’s Self in Jesus Christ
- Capitalism is Biblical
- Bible-Based figures such as Calvin and Beza
- Discernmentalist history such as the Crusades; the Inquisition; the Protestant Reformation especially the superiority and supremacy of Calvin and Calvinism; why Theocracy is Biblically correct; the burning of Servetus; the Salem Witch Trials; the rise of Fundamentalism, the Religious Right and the GOIP; etc.
- Puritanism and Discernmentalism
- And much, much more…
Discernmentalist Power Cards: You gotta collect them all!
Dr. I. Todyaso underwent Cybernetic Heresy Hunting Surgery earlier today in order to increase our Heresy Hunting efficiency by 300% more than the average rate of other ODMs especially Ken Silva’s Raw Sewage Ministries. If Dr. I. Todyaso’s surgery goes well the rest of the Online Discernmentalist Mafia hope to follow suit bringing our Heresy Hunting accuracy to over 1000%. This new Cybernetic Heresy Hunting Surgery will also help in our preaching the Gospel of God’s Law and Wrath to all—pictured here:
Discernmentalist after undergoing Cybernetic Heresy Hunting Surgery threatens an Emergent heretic with the Gospel of God’s Law and Wrath and Hell.
We’ll also be able to teach Discernmentalist skills such as Self Righteousness to a wider range audience:
And in the end our army of Discernmentalists after undergoing Cybernetic Heresy Hunting Surgery will be able to bring Doomsday upon all that we deem heretical:
Using Eric Barger’s STRETCH and Revisionist Technology and Todd Friel’s Subliminal Brainwashing microwaves Ken Silva and his loyal band of Discernmentalists have found a way to hit the Preteen/Tween and Teenage television markets. The first of their fruits is:
Weekends at 9:30AM
All times ET/PTThat’s So Discernmentalist is a new live-action situation comedy starring Raven (formerly credited as Raven-Symone, The Cosby Show) as Reagan “Marxist” Basher, a winsome Capitalist-loving teen whose ability to glimpse flashes of the future and know all through perfect osmosis cause trouble whenever she meets Emergent and Red-Letter Christians. Helping her out (or sometimes into) these predicaments are her best friends Eddie Silva and Chelsea Barger, whose loyalty can be counted on whether Reagan’s escapades involve hilarious disguises, hostile government overthrows of corporations by God’s Only Inerrant/Republican Party, exploitation, discernmentalism or a hint of danger. Allowing her flights of fancy — yet eager to keep her feet on the ground — are Reagan’s parents, Victoria and Todd “Emergent” Basher. And then there’s precocious kid brother Cory, who is both an annoyance and invaluable resource to his big sis. Cory not only idolizes Final President Reagan and Capitalism, but the love of money is his total root motivation with all his wacky “get rich quick” business schemes. Watch with the whole family and learn these Discernmentalist values: arrogance, greed, haughtiness, Capitalist Materialism, divisionism, knowing by osmosis, condescending selfishness, avarice, revisionism, strawman arguments, how to listen to only yourself when you yell and scream at your opponents and much much more…©GOIP ProductionsLength: 00:23
Genre: Children, Sitcom, Comedy
Original Airdate: 2003+7/10