Rick Warren and Brian McLaren Save Bigfoot! Sort of!

February 22, 2008

bigfoot-get-saved-copy.jpg

Discernmentalist News-

Rick Warren known for his heretical book the Purpose Driven Life which presents the soft-shell version of the Gospel and teaches the lie, God has a purpose for you, and Brian McLaren who has written many heretical books that tell people false teachings such as the Kingdom of God is “Here and Now” saved Bigfoot while hunting together for new paradigms to push on churches for church growth. Bigfoot had read The Purpose Driven Life and found certainty in his world of savage beasts and wild berries, but then after reading A New Kind of Christian lost all certainty and began looking for Emergent Villages to ravage. Brian McLaren (a heretic) and Rick Warren (another heretic) were able to sooth the savage beast and assure him God had a plan for him and that even in his uncertainty that we can still bring the Kingdom of God to all and be little Images of Christ.

 Yet, all was saved when Rick Warren (a heretic) accidentally regressed and dropped a copy of John Macarthur’s “Truth Wars” that Rick and Brian were deconstructing and as he read it was so struck by the magnitude of Truth and began spouting anti emergent slogans at Brian McLaren (a heretic). Brian McLaren then in a fit of rage began to pummel Bigfoot in a sicken display of Emergent violence.

 The Picture was take while Bigfoot just finished reading John Macarthur’s book. Rick Warren was off in the bushes fulfilling another purpose and realized he must have dropped John Macarthur book and was having trouble finding weeds to use instead.

 Bigfoot was quoted as saying, ” Arrrgh, herrrr mmmhhh roooo.” No one knows what that means.


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,947 other followers

%d bloggers like this: