August 29, 2020
Fresh from our presses we bring you a new course from the good old days. Learn how Whataboutism came about and how you can use this effective tool to up your Discernmentalism game. Soon you’ll be out-arguing the enemy tenfold. Increase your scorecard using these simple tactics—examples-
The lamestream media reports a hate crime:
- What about black on black crime?
- What about the racism toward white men?
A gay starts talking about his or her fears:
- What about the persecution of straight white men?
- What about your bigotry towards conservative Christian businesses?
Someone accuses Trump supporters of racism:
- What about the Democrats? They’re the party of the KKK.
- What about liberal blacks and Hollywood being racist towards straight white men?
Get it–got it good because we told you so.
May 18, 2020
ExtraPhobia News: In hard hitting discernmentalism we have discovered China vies to be car leader. A spokesman for Apprising Ministries (AM) and Slice of Laodicea view this move as unbiblical and against absolute truth. The big Three AM suggested alludes to the trinity…..China is attempting to be unitarian and we need to stop this in the name of absolute truth.”
April 18, 2020
ODM Express File Photo
Oh yes, we would like to thank ODM Express for their ‘vigilance’, ‘honest’ investigative reporting, and ‘clarity’, old, ‘unbiased’ news media. Cooper Academy-D.B. Cooper—proof Jeff Bezos is D. B. Cooper… How else do you think he has all that money? The Lamestream media doesn’t want you to know the “Truth”? Wake up! Sheeple! You know who else doesn’t want you to know the “Truth”? Chad Holtz that’s who. Chad as you may not know is a Secret Hindu Agent. Chad also works for Big Amazon and is part of the Amazon ninjas trying to suppress “the Real Truth.”
Chad once thought he got saved by shaking quasi-Universalist Emergence semi-Pelagurite guru Rob Bell’s hand. We also heard he voted for Hillary. Also Amazon carries the “purpose-seeker-driven” books that Chad reads like that semi-pelican sinfully-ecumenical Emergent heretic Rob Bell’s and purpose-drivel shaman Rich Warren’s. Proof that there’s a nefarious conspiracy and hidden feminist political agenda going on. They’re all in on the secret cover-up to hide the “Truth” that Jeff Bezos is D. B. Cooper. And as our former co-Truth Warrior Will Farel XV has said:
Chad Holtz who has been harassing this young man, who share my Divine zeal for the Truth, with his peace mantras.
Let us take a closer look at this “peace” that Chad ends his heretic enabling comments with. Remember those “peace” cries of the hippies? What peace were they talking about? I will tell you. The peace that would invite the Communists like Barak Obama, together with his supporter, Spiritual Guru Brian McLaren*, to take over our beautiful Christian United States of America. This same peace is also the theme of John Lennon’s song “Give Peace a Chance”. As we know John Lennon and Yoko Ono were followers of the cult of the Hare Krishna mantra of Hinduism and that was what this song is really about. So here we have Chad shouting peace, peace like a mantra. What should be our conclusion? Chad might also be secret a follower of the Hare Krishna movement!
As you can see my “facts” have been well researchmentalized—believe me…
Spread the Conspiracy,
March 12, 2020
In a pandemic of epic proportions the Center for Discernmental Diseases (CDD) reports that 100s of Discrnmentalists have been affected by the “Discerna” virus. Eric Barger has already discerned: “I suppose those who are writing or repeating that sort of condemnation believe that only a select few are “woke” enough to walk the straight and narrow of political correctness. What about “Lime Disease,” the origin of which is Lime, Connecticut, or “Ebola,” named for a river in the African Republic of Congo, or “Zika” or “West Nile,” both of which originated in Uganda, or the Swine Flu, from, you guessed it, pigs? How far will the PC nonsense go!?”
Other Discernmentalists have discernmentalized that the “Discerna” virus is a moral good for Ayn Rand’s social-Darwinism.
So if you or any of your loved ones have been stricken by the “Discerna” virus—-the ODMafia recommends mothballs for your protection. Only $9,999! Act now and get a Holy HAND GRENADE free with purchase…results may vary.
March 11, 2020
UK officials are studying whether a Online Discernmentalists leader blamed for the character assassination of John Armstrong poses a credible threat to the UK, a top UK military official said on Wednesday. They have committed other character assassinations in the past and are therefore concerned. “Everyone is quite riveted on analyzing that and seeing what further we can find out,” UK Army General Rick Warren said in testimony before the Senate Armed Services Committee.
Stay tuned to NDC (Nationalist Discernmentalist News Networks) for further updates.
October 21, 2019
Prophetess ELSandi Discernment News Briefs (Outside El Paso)- Last night around 6pm an unnamed Discernmentalist got a knock at his door—answering it he was greeted by a young female. “Hello;” she said: “have you a minute to spare—are you a good person? Do you know where you’ll be if you die tonight? Do you know Jesus as your Lord and Savior? I have a few Bible verses I’d like to share with you.” “Be gone Satan and go home—don’t you know that a woman’s place is at home submitting to her husband’s divine authority? God appointed the role of sharing the Gospel/all information about Himself to men only. Besides that the True Gospel is that God made Jesus as a Penal Substitute to satisfy His unquenchable wrath yet our Sovereign God still remains angry so angry with a commendable hatred and unsatisfied wrath towards sinners (which we must imitate) that He threatens to throw as many people into hell as possible—all out of His Great Pleasure and good purposes of course. We rejoice at the destruction of the pre-damned wicked reprobates aka Papists; RINOs; Lutherans and Semi-Pelagian Armenian heretics and will dip our toes in their blood and dance to celebrate their final end. Our Angry Sovereign God is so good and worthy of worship! If you can’t handle the Hard Truths of the Bible like rejoicing at your non-Elect grandma who prayed the Rosary one time roasting in hell for all eternity and that a woman’s place is to be a silent doormat for men then you were never saved to begin with and most likely a False Convert.”—the unknown Discernmentalist said—angrily slamming the door in the female Evangelist’s face and turning her away. The final remarks of that unnamed Discernmentalist were overheard through the door cracks by passersby: “The nerve of that woman Having the Audacity to Preach the Gospel and Help People.”
January 7, 2010
GOIP Press—Extree extree read all aboutit! Ken Silva and Eric Barger unveil a new invention for all GOIP Dicernmentalists. Introducing the new Self-Inflating Egoanator Device–guaranteed to aid Discernmentalists in their Truth War efforts by giving Discernmentalists a quick boost to their egos and helping them to one-up those vile Emergent heretics. This device is so fearsome to our enemies that it strikes a wave of terror even amongst the hardest-hearted atheists. They fear this device so much they even attack it:
in the words of (notable atheist) Arthur C. Clarke, “there is something unspeakably sinister about a machine that does nothing — absolutely nothing — except turn itself off.”
But who listens to atheists anyway—certainly not any True Absolute Truth Discernmentalists. Anyways behold the horror of the Absolute Truth proving Self-Inflating Egoanator Device all ye atheists, apostates and heretics:
Wee vill vin the Truth Wars because we alone hold to the Absolute Truth Doctrines of John MacArthur’s Truth Wars™ and the Absolute Truth is ours alone.