Irrelevant Magazine!

March 15, 2015

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Emerging Church Tied To Horrible Plane Crash…

September 22, 2011

This just goes to show just how far the Emerging Church will go to justify their ungodly rebellion against the Only True and Correct Doctrines.

New raw footage of last Friday’s deadly air show crash in Reno shows the doomed plane nosediving and exploding on audience.

Watch: Crowd screams ‘Oh my God’

In related news: The Emerging Church has also been tied to a brutally fatal shark attack. We have evidence just read this: “We saw the shark’s nose emerge and then the man just vanished. It was very sudden, then the animal just swam off. ” That’s just how sinisterly vile and disgusting these Emergent types are in their corruption of Pure Doctrine… They violently try to fight the Truth of Orthodoxy by leading people astray into apostasy. This is why we must fight this Truth War to protect God’s Truth from those infected by the Emerging Church disease.

All my researchmentalism on this subject has been “well-researched” so you should just take my word as Absolute Truth and fact. In fact, you all should thank God for this site and sites like the infallible Ken Silva’s CRN for our great and important research such as this article!  If you didn’t have us to Take A Stand on things such as this matter the Emerging hordes will destroy God’s Truth.


Pastor Steven Dilday Needs You!

September 19, 2011

Pastor Steven Dilday needs you to spread the fear and spread the hate against Roman Catholics and Protestants who wear clerical collars and vestments! Yes, we too want you to get behind this most pressing and urgent of issues in our zeal for the defense of the Pure Doctrines of our Truth War. How dare we let those grace-hating heretics wear inappropriate church-going attire in their church services! We must take a stand in Sovereign grace and Wrath and put a stop to this nonsense. We Know that Jesus would never approve of men who lead churches wearing dresses in their services. Clearly this must be the MYSTERY OF INIQUITIES: the BABYLONIAN ROAD BACK TO ROME! We must hate this unbiblical heresy against the Doctrines of Grace with A commendable hatred. So remember these words from the Truth War Gospel: “Liberty and Grace to you; hate the rest!”


Be Rapture-Ready for May 21, 2011!

May 17, 2011

Prepare for May 21st and be Rapture Ready with the Online Discernmentalist Mafia’s handy new RaptureHatch for the roofs of True Churches and the homes of True Regenerate Converts. Doomsday is soon approaching… Don’t get Left Behind with the unregenerate non-Elect heathens… Let John MacArthur confirm you in our Pure Truth War Doctrines and prove that you are indeed Rapture Ready and we’ll install a RaptureHatch on your roof today!

This site (an Online Discernmentalist Mafia partner site) reveals the most complete written, audio, and video Bible teachings which conclusively prove May 21, 2011 to be Judgment Day and The Rapture, and October 21, 2011 to be the end of the world. It is most urgent to examine yourself, whether you are of the Regenerate Elect and therefore are saved.


Love Wins?

March 1, 2011

         

             A Blog Post by some of the Research Robot Monkeys

                          of the Online Discernmentalist Mafia:

Recently the ultra-mega sinfully ecumenical quasi-semi-Pelagian reprobated and heretical Universalist Emergent guru Rob Bell broke into the OD Mafia Headquarters. “Ho ho;” he said, “I’ve got Good News for you today…Love Wins.”

Alarmed by the disturbance our masters and heroes Dr. I . Todyaso, Dr. Truthslayer and Dr. Don Jobson quickly withdrew their weapons. Now brandishing their bullhorns in the manner of Todd Friel—they began to shout down that vile and Wretched sinner Rob Bell. Our heroes the OD Mafia proclaimed the True Gospel—the good news of God’s Absolute Sovereign Wrath and commendable hatred towards all those whose doctrines are impure and theology is incorrect.

All Rob Bell could say was “Love Wins…Love Wins…Love Wins…” Suddenly during the chaos Brian D. “amn your soul to hell” McLaren appeared in a mystical mist of confusion and grabbed the noble crew of the Online Discernmentalist Mafia and then disappeared. We haven’t seen or heard from either Dr. I . Todyaso, Dr. Truthslayer or Dr. Don Jobson ever since—although we suspect that those symbols of all that is evil in the world Rob Bell and Brian McLaren are holding them captive. The last thing we saw was Rob Bell driving off in a van laughing and calmly proclaiming that “Love Wins.”

P. S. If you see an Ice Cream Truck disguised as a traveling ministry with “Love Wins” painted on the side, please report the sighting to your nearest local Discernmentalist church.

            A. J. Research Robot Monkeys filling in for the OD Mafia


Todd Friel Slips Into Arminian Heresy

January 6, 2011

Let there be no misunderstanding at this point. The Arminian limits the atonement as certainly as does the Calvinist. The Calvinist limits the extent of it in that he says it does not apply to all persons…while the Arminian limits the power of it, for he says that in itself it does not actually save anybody. The Calvinist limits it quantitatively, but not qualitatively; the Arminian limits it qualitatively, but not quantitatively. For the Calvinist it is like a narrow bridge that goes all the way across the stream; for the Arminian it is like a great wide bridge that goes only half-way across. As a matter of fact, the Arminian places more severe limitations on the work of Christ than does the Calvinist. (Lorraine Boettner, The Reformed Doctrine of Predestination (Phillipsburg, New Jersey: Presbyterian and Reformed Publishing Company, 1932) p. 153.)

Typical Arminianist semi-Pelagian heretic: “Jesus died for the sins of the world.”

True Bible-Believer: “No He didn’t. Jesus died for the Elect and the sins of the Elect only.” (John 3:16; John 1:29)

Around a minute and fifty-eight seconds into the video clip above, Todd made a blasphemous error—he commited Roman Arminian and  Popish idolatries by saying that: “Jesus shed His blood for forgiveness of the sins of the world.” Therefore Todd has just denied the Atonement—which is very dangerous ground to be on. Perhaps Todd has read one too many books by that false teacher, arch-heretic and anti-Christ Brian McLaren against Ken Silva’s clear teachings. Todd you have just been exposed as a Arminianist semi-Pelagian heretic—although we suspect Todd is really secretly a Crypto-Lutheran trying to pollute our Pure Doctrines.


The Heart Of The Discernmentalist Gospel

November 2, 2010

Most of you are going to hell because you were not specially chosen and frozen like We God’s Truth Biblical Elect (Calvinazis) are—so quake now in mortal fear and terror at the horrors that await ye, reprobates, especially if you are Roman Catholic, Arminian, a Pentecostal tongue-babbler, Emergent, queer or even worse all of the above:

P.S. Hell is a “real place” so We’d hate to be all of you reprobates (non-Calvinazis) on the day that you die so remember We tried to lovingly warn you by the Absolute Truth of our Pure Doctrines which have saved Us from an eternity in flames.

P. P. S. This is also warning to Pastorboy aka (Name withheld upon request) to get back in line with our Pure Doctrines.


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