Thankfully, our fellow discernmentalists Discerning The World are applying STRETCH tech to the world of discernmentalism. In case you are wondering STRETCH stands for Survey Truth Revise & Exaggerate Truncate Cacophony of Hagiomania.
Here is what DTW found out about Rob Bell:
“Rob Bell – The Story We’re Telling: sin, salvation, business, art, justice and the importance of beginning in the beginning”
Indeed, very subversive stuff. Story telling,sin and even a THREAT to go back to the beginning. So what is so dark about….THE BEGINNING?
Using STRETCH… this is the sinister plot that was EXPOSED….remember STRETCH accurately interprets EVERYTHING! So here is the STRETCH interpretation as follows (will original spelling errors included):
” [DTW note: they are saying that you have got to go back to the beginning, go back to where ancient knowledge originately from, where sacret arts originationed from in order to move forward. How far do we have to go back? To the very beginning, of course. We, each individual person, needs to eat from the tree of life in order to gain knowledge.
Genesis 3:4-5 4 The serpent said to the woman, “You surely will not die! 5 “For God knows that in the day you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”] ”
Insightful for sure!
Discernmentalist groups like us like to zone in on the negative.We like to find the worst, believe the least, and expect to find a sinister plot behind every bush or milk crate. We fully support this. This is indeed an excellent application of ascertaining truth.
However we do have some questions………………………………..
Beginning Now…..lets look at the “BEGINNING”
Ge 1:1 – In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.
1) All knowledge and ALL things (visible and invisable) would begin with and from God’s creation. Very dark indeed. Truth coming from God himself…how dare Him!
Ps 111:10 – The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow his precepts have good understanding. To him belongs eternal praise.
2) Hmmmm. Could Rob perhaps be alluding to the beginning in reference to wisdom? Perhaps, but in good discernmentalist fashion DTW does not provide context. Only DTW ‘wisdom.’ Of course we endorse this kind of expert discernmentalism…out of context wisdom.
Pr 1:7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.
3) This is astounding. Fools despise wisdom. Not us… we love DTW ‘wisdom. ‘ Proverbs also suggests that the FEAR (REVERENCE) of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge. Hmmm. Something must be wrong with this verse because DTW suggests that we must reference satan as the beginning.
Recently we heard DTW were revising their STRETCH TECH as they’ve found even newer applications of it.
We at ODMAFA would like to put an offer in on this newly revised version of STRETCH TECHNOLOGY. This is obviously a MUCH needed technology that would alleviate us from having to think rationally, read our bibles, or depend on our robot research monkeys. If anyone out there can put us in touch with DTW, or contact DTW so that we can get a bargain deal on new STRETCH we’d appreciate it!
Truthslayer stretching the Truth with Action
PS Just remember that SATAN according to Discernmentalist Tradition is at the beginning….not God, or wisdom.